Page 20 of The Last Dance

I nod. I kind of figured. She’d never actually said those words to me, but I didn’t doubt she did. ‘She absolutely should.’

‘Do you still love her?’

I shake my head. ‘I can’t even go there. I’ve finally pulled myself off the cliff I was dangling on and now I’m with Karmen. I haven’t allowed myself to even consider how I might still feel about her.’

She purses her lips. ‘God, Henry, you’re such an idiot.’ She stands with a groan. ‘You know, I always thought you were the smart one out of all of us. The charming guy with a heartbreaking life story. You adored her – how did you let this happen?’

‘I don’t know.’ I shrug. I really don’t. It happened so fast and at the time it was what I think we both needed to happen. I never expected feelings and guilt to bombard me the way they did after. I truthfully thought the exact opposite would happen. I was as shocked by the words coming out of my mouth as Ambri was. Once I said them, I knew I could never take back the hurt that came with them. ‘Ambri is the smartest between the two of us. She cut me out of her life. I was only hurting her by continuing to depend on her. She deserves so much more than me.’

‘She has a boyfriend now. Noah. He’s a really good guy.’

I take a deep breath through my nose, trying to force away the thought of her with anyone but me. I can’t be upset over this. It was my choice to leave the way I did. ‘She deserves a good guy and if this Noah is that, then I’m glad.’ I finally say. My voice is flat, insinuating I’m not completely honest. Saying the name of the guy now in the place I could have been doesn’t feel even a little bit good. I try to put myself in her shoes. According to Ben I broke her heart in a way they’d never seen happen with Ambri. Ben once told me it was like I had died too and it took everything they had to pull her out of the place she was in afterwards. I can’t picture her broken like I was because she was always the strongest person I knew. The fact thatIdid that to her, is part of what kept me away. I couldn’t face it. Sometimes I wish I could have been the guy she needed. But I wasn’t. And she deserves to be happy with someone who won’t do what I did to her. ‘I want her to be happy, Claire.’

Claire stands with a huff. ‘If you wanted her to be happy you wouldn’t have done something so pathetically stupid.’

I nod again. She’s not wrong.

‘Listen, I’ll forgive you at some point but that doesn’t let you off the hook. And you have to tell her you’re back yourself. You have forty-eight hours, Mr Decker. After that what happens is anyone’s guess. It might not be me sitting in wait in your office…’ She glares at me, smacking me in the back of the head as she exits my office. A move I definitely deserve.

---