Page 15 of The Last Dance

‘Ambri knows nothing about you being back, but you better hurry the fuck up and finally apologize because I can only hold Claire off for at most a few more days. She loves Ambri and she’s not exactly happy with your dumb ass.’

I sigh as I sit up from the couch. I make my way past Karmen in the kitchen and into our bedroom at the back of the apartment, hoping she doesn’t overhear the conversation.

‘I will. Give me another day to figure out what to say. I’m sorry will never be enough.’ I’ve tried.

Ben laughs into the phone. ‘You’re not wrong about that. You pulled a real dick move. You told your best friend you needed a new life, one that didn’t include her and all the memories that went with her.Afteryou slept with her.Onher birthday. There is no bigger fuck up, according to Claire, so the sooner the better if you ask me, preferably before you accidentally run into her. I’m sure, knowing Ambri, she’ll forgive you and things will go back to the way they were. Eventually. Probably, I mean. I’ve walked out on a lot of women who didn’t hate me after.’

‘Is that so? Name one.’

‘Uh… Jessica.’

‘The girl from junior year of high school?’ I laugh.

Jessica is the girl he dated right before Claire. I use the word datedveryloosely.

‘Yep, I slept with her and never looked back, yet she still wanted me. Her and that hot pink thong she let me hang from my rear-view mirror. God, I was a fucking stud.’ He laughs to himself. He doesn’t remember it the same way I do.

‘Karmen’s right, you are a pig at times.’ I laugh. She’s heard the stories, good and bad, and she’s come to the same conclusion I have: Ben is fun, and sometimes a pig. It’s what makes him Ben. ‘And if I remember correctly, you looked back every Saturday afternoon for two months.’

‘Well, ya know, what can I say? Once a lady has a piece of Ben, she don’t wanna let him go. We were strictly a “friends with benefits” kind of situation.’

‘Right, so then when you actually decided to end your little arrangement, she was good with it?’

I already know the answer to this because I was there. Ben decided telling her during lunch period was the easiest since they’d be in public and she couldn’t do anything stupid. He underestimated her. She stabbed one of those plastic forks right into his forearm, breaking the prongs off deep enough he had to go to the emergency room to have them removed.

‘I don’t even remember, it was way too long ago.’ He goes quiet before bursting into a laugh. ‘Although, I do still have the scars.’

‘Exactly. I think if I saw Ambri right now and only said the words “I’m sorry”, I’d end up with more than a scar.’

A scar is something I already have, but I did that to myself by leaving. Once I was gone, I regretted it. But the longer I was gone, I knew I didn’t deserve to come back into her life.

The last time I tried to call, her number had been changed. I knew she would never answer. I’d tried calling her a few other times and it always went to voicemail. She never replied to texts; she probably never even read them. But knowing I couldn’t even hear her voice through a message, that was a rough day, mostly because it was a self-inflicted wound that only I could heal. I didn’t hurt her intentionally, but I couldn’t see her past my own demons. I was a selfish asshole.

‘She could put your ass in the morgue and you’d pretty much deserve it. But that’s not Ambri’s style. She’s tough. I haven’t even really heard her mention you since you left. Partly because I’m not allowed to even say your name around her, Claire’s rule. But she’s also gotten hella good at burying away her feelings.’

‘Yeah. That’s something both of us have perfected.’

‘Who’s on the phone?’ Karmen asks as she walks in.

‘Ben,’ I say with a probably guilty smile.

‘Tell her soon,’ Ben growls.

‘Sure thing. I’ll call ya later.’

‘Asshole,’ Ben blurts into the receiver as I hang up.

‘Did he just call you an asshole?’ Karmen asks, hearing him from the few feet away from me.

‘He’s kidding around. That’s Ben.’ I shove my phone in my pocket. ‘Listen, I should probably go to the office for a few to get some things set up.’ I need to think and I can’t do it here.

Karmen shoves out her bottom lip in a frown. ‘You’re such a workaholic. You’re gonna work yourself to death! It’s all you do.’ She rummages through a box, tossing some things onto the bed. ‘You know what? We should go out! It’s so boring sitting around here all day.AndI hate unpacking. It’s not like I need to get it all unpacked in a hurry.’

‘We’ve never sat around all the time.’ I sit on the bed, staring out the window into the city. I don’t know how to prepare myself for what I need to do this week.

‘In California we didn’t but here, you’ve been super hesitant to go anywhere but home and work. How about you show me around tomorrow? I don’t have any jobs booked until next week, so it’ll be perfect. Take the afternoon off and show me all your favorite places. Please?’ She comes over, making herself comfortable on my lap, her puppy-dog eyes activated, begging me without any need for words.

I nod, forcing a smile. ‘I can do that.’

‘Perfect! How about we meet at Imperial? That place we ordered from the other night? I loved the food and would love to actually eat anywhere besides our apartment.’

I have pretty much convinced her to eat takeout since we got here. I wasn’t ready to be out there, where I know she is, and possibly running into the old life I’ve avoided.

‘I’ll be there.’ I kiss her on the lips before she stands up, heading back into the kitchen to unpack.

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