Page 85 of The Do-Over

Apparently my closed-door plan worked—incredibly well—because I stress-ate Cheetos and watched reruns ofGilmore Girlsuntil I fell sound asleep in my clothes.

Didn’t talk to my mother or Todd at all.

Didn’t wake up until the next morning, in fact.

As someone who’d always taken great pride in self-discipline, waking up in the previous day’s clothing with Cheeto residue on my fingertips wasn’t a great sign. And yet, for some reason, I didn’t hate the way it felt.

I took a deep breath and walked into the classroom. I could see the back of Nick’s head as he looked at the book on the table in front of him, and just like that, I had a stomach full of butterflies.

When I got to our table, he was texting and didn’t look up. I sat down and got out my book.

Nick looked up and our eyes met, and all the memories of the DONC came rushing at me.

He gave me a closed-mouth smile, like he didn’t know me, and then he went back to his phone.

I felt the heat flood my cheeks and I swear to God I lost the ability to hear for a second.

I looked at him, but Nick was still just staring at his phone.

Why wouldn’t he look at me?

I opened my mouth to tell him I had his jacket in my locker when Bong walked in and said, “Put your books away—it’s test time, kiddos.”

Ugh—I’d forgotten all about the test. I’d forgotten to study. I put away my stuff and moved to the other table, but the knot of dread in my stomach kept growing.

And it had nothing to do with my lack of preparation. For thefirst time in my life, I didn’t give a shit about my grades.

All I cared about was the fact that Nick was ignoring me.

Avoiding me.

Two days before, he’d been making out with me in the dark on the side of my grandma’s house, but now he couldn’t even smile or say hi or just acknowledge my existence?

I spent the entire class period working on my test, struggling to keep my thoughts at bay while I grasped for answers. When the bell finally rang, I packed up my stuff, and when I grabbed my backpack, Nick was already walking away. I wasn’t about to beg or chase him down, but I did walk a little faster than usual, desperately hoping to see him waiting for me.

He wasn’t.

I spent the next hour being sad, feeling absolutely destroyed by his rejection.

But then I realized something.

The old Em might just accept his brush-off and deal with it, but the DONC had changed me. It might’ve been a wild time and an absolutely ridiculous day, but living my life for myself had feltgood. I’d always lived to please everyone else, but who would ever do what I really wanted, if not me?

It felt a little bit like fate when I was about to enter the library at lunch and Nick came out the very same door. He looked serious and in his own head and didn’t even see me until I said, “Hey, you.”

I turned around so I was walking beside him in his direction. “So did you get detention, too?”

His eyebrows went down just a little, like he was processingmy words and sudden appearance, but he didn’t smile. He said, “Not yet.”

“Lucky.” I lightly bumped into his side. “I’m going to have detention for two weeks, but a big part of that is my intercom thing. Apparently I used the A/V equipment to ‘bully another student.’ Can you believe that?”

“Yeah, um, wild.” He stopped walking. “Listen, I’ve got to go that way.” He pointed down the hall to our left. “So, see you later?”

“Sure, later,” I said, but as he walked away, I pushed through people to catch up with him again.

“Nick!”

He looked back at me but kept moving. “Yeah?”