Page 101 of Mr. Wrong Number

Jillian’s eyes widened, and I could tell she was trying to discern whether or not I was drunk. I wished I were, but sadly Iwas sober enough to see the fight brewing in my father and the odd disconnection on my mom’s face. I decided to dial it back and said, “Kidding, you guys.”

My dad gestured for the waiter to bring him a scotch before saying to me, “So how’s business?”

“Good.” I did the slow nod and said, “Having a hell of a good year.”

He nodded. “Fantastic. Too bad it isn’t your business; not reallyyourgood year at all.”

“That is so true, Dad.”

“Been promoted lately?”

“Since the last time you asked me a month ago? Let me think.” I tilted my head. “Nope.”

“Ha ha, funny man.” My dad crossed his arms over his chest. “It just seems like you’ve been stuck in this position for a while.”

“I’m not stuck; I love my job.”

“Said the stuck guy.” He looked at me for a long minute, narrowed his eyes, and said, “You don’t get to the top by loving your job, Col. You get to the top by—”

“Can you guys knock it off?” My sister rolled her eyes and said, “As exciting as it is to talk about Col’s horrible, awful, unthinkable job as a very successful financial analyst, I would like to hear about the girl he’s been seeing.”

Just like that, my throat was frozen and I couldn’t swallow. “Not now, Jill.”

“No, we’d like to hear all about this girl, sweetheart.” My mom was beaming at me when she said, “Your grandfather called her delightful.”

“I’m not doing this.”

My dad said, “You can’t indulge your mother this one time?”

“Damn it.”

My mom whispered, “Language, Colin.”

I took a deep breath. “I’m not seeing her anymore, so it doesn’t matter.”

Jillian mouthed,I’m sorry, and I just shrugged. My father, however, took the opportunity to make me feel like shit.

“What happened with this girl? Your grandmother thought it might be serious.”

I looked down at the linen tablecloth. “Turns out it wasn’t.”

“Who ended it?”

“Dad, I don’t think that’s any of our business.” Jillian spoke up but he ran right over her.

“Why not? We’re family.” He turned his full attention on me and said, “Tell us why you broke up.”

I needed another drink, because I could tell my father was in the mood to press it. I thought about coming up with something good, some mature, boring reason, but then I thought,Screw it.Itwasfamily, so why not be brutally honest?

“Well, we were doing the whole friends-with-benefits thing and it was really great. She’s smart and funny and a real fireball in the sack, so everything was clicking, y’know?”

“Knock it off, Colin,” my father warned, looking at the table next to ours to see if Edward Russell was eavesdropping on our table’s conversation.

“No, you said we’re family and you’re right; we are.You’re the ones I should be talking to about this.” I cleared my throatand lowered my voice. “Okay, so, we were banging it out all the time and having a great—”

“Stop it.” My dad leaned over the table and pointed at me. “Stop it right now, or this dinner is over.”

“Oh, no. Not dinner.” I grinned at Jillian, but she looked uncomfortable. “Actually, as long as we get to have those appetizers, cocktails, and karaoke, I don’t care if we ever get dinner.”