Page 64 of Eight Seconds to Ride

Cope is quiet for a moment, but he’s staring at the side of my face. I can feel the weight of his gaze like a thousand-pound brick. Honestly, he’s probably in shock. I don’t think, in all the years we’ve been friends, that I’ve ever told him I have feelings for somebody. Sure, we’ve talked about people I’ve hooked up with plenty. But feelings? Hell no. It’s not what I do.

“Do you think he feels the same?” he finally asks.

Scrubbing a hand down my face, I finally look over and meet his gaze. His dark brown eyes hold not an ounce of judgement or humor.

“I don’t fucking know,” I blow out. “Yes? Maybe? I haven’t asked him.”

His soft chuckle reaches my ears. “Do you think maybe you should start there?”

“Gee, thanks,” I deadpan. “Never thought of that.”

A few beats pass, and he takes another sip of his beer.

“Real feelings?” he asks. “Or like you just want to get him underneath you.”

I finish the rest of my beer before mumbling under my breath, “Well, already did that.”

Glancing over, I could laugh at how wide Cope’s eyes are, if I wasn’t in such a shit mood. “How long’s this been going on?”

“A while.”

“How’d I not know?”

“Because I didn’t tell you.” My answer’s flat as I stare at him with a bored expression.

“Not what I meant. Although, I don’t know why you didn’t, but that’s neither here nor there. We share very close quarters on the road. I don’t understand how I never picked up on this.”

“Well, you sleep like the dead, for one.”

He reaches over, shoving me with his arm. “So, what’s the big deal? You like the guy.”

I don’t even know how to put words to this without sounding ridiculous. “Cope, I couldn’t even tell you the last time I had feelings for anybody. Like, it had to have been early in high school. I’m so used to being alone, only thinking of myself.” As I get the sentence out, I spot Sterling. He’s across the yard, and it’s a miracle I can see him at all, given how dark it is, but I think I could spot him anywhere. He hasn’t seen me yet, for which I’m both thankful and disappointed about. Turning my head, I meet Cope’s gaze. “What if I don’t have what it takes to treat him the way he deserves to be treated? What if I really am a selfish dick?”

Cope stares at me for a moment, lips parted, eyes widened slightly. “Ho-ly shit, dude.”

My brows pinch together. “What?”

“You’re down real fucking bad for him, aren’t you?”

“What? Why do you say that?”

“Well, for one”—he counts on his fingers—“when you spotted him just a moment ago, you practically got hearts in your eyes. And for two, the fact that this is even a concern of yours at all speaks volumes, bro. You’re the type of asshole who finds enjoyment in pushing people’s buttons. If this were any other bronc rider you were hooking up with, there’s no way you would’ve kept your mouth shut. You would’ve blown this up to try to get in their head in a twisted game to fuck up their performance in the arena. He’s your competition, Shooter, and you haven’t told a single soul in an attempt to use it against him.”

Well, shit.

Cope reaches over, gripping a hand on my knee. “Give yourself a little bit of credit, Shooter. There’s a lot more to you than the cocky dickhead you let the world see. Don’t hold back with him just because you’re worried you don’t have what it takes. I think you’ll likely surprise yourself if given the chance.” He slides across the bed of the truck before he stops on the tailgate and adds, “And for what it’s worth, home boy spotted you a minute ago, and the look in his eyes tells me everything I need to know. The feeling’s reciprocated. Just talk to him.”

I’m at a loss for words. Throwing him a weak smile, he winks before jumping down and walking away. His advice running through my mind on a loop, I let it sit with me for a moment before I get up too, and go get a refill. I want to go to Sterling, explain what’s going on in my head, but at the same time, something’s holding me back. What if I open up even more to him, only for him to decide I’m not worth the effort. He decides I’m too much trouble.

I find him easily. He’s sitting around the fire with Jessie and Daisy. As if he can feel my gaze, he turns his head, eyes locking with mine. A small smile slides on his lips, and he lifts his hand in a quick wave. I return the gesture before heading back to my truck with my next two beers.

I’m not totally sure how long I sit here, drinking those beers, and feeling sorry for myself, but eventually, Sterling comes over. He looks timid, like he’s not sure if I’ll turn him away or bite his head off. It stings. I hate that he feels like that because of me.

Climbing up, he sits right beside me. Much closer than Cope did. Our arms brush as he gets comfortable, a zap of electricity passing through us at the brief contact. “Hi.”

Hearing his voice brings a smile to my face. “Hi.”

“You okay?”

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