Page 44 of Insatiable Hunger

Grumbling, I drag a hand down my face.

She tucks her legs underneath her, chuckling, presumably at my very obvious discomfort. “How did it happen? You’re being so closed door with these details, and I’m trying to live vicariously through you while I suffer through my horrid dry spell. Spill!”

“Fine,” I concede, raising off the couch to head inside. “But if we’re having this conversation, we need more booze.”

Once I grab the bottle of vodka and some Sprite, we down a couple of shots while I figure out what I can tell her to satisfy her without giving too much away. I’ve put myself in a sticky situation, because if I tell her anything at all that could potentially be linked to Zeke, we’re fucked.

Katie sets the bottle down on the table before turning to me. “Okay, so, he’s still married, I’m guessing?”

I nod.

“So, how did this happen?” There is not one ounce of judgement in her voice, only genuine curiosity.

“It wasn’t supposed to,” I tell her honestly.

“I believe you.”

“We… I don’t know. We were arguing, and one thing led to another.”

“Did you have sex?”

“Not full-blown sex, but we did do sexual stuff.” My heart is hammering in my chest as I recount what went down in my bedroom the other day.

Katie is quiet for a moment. “Do you have feelings for him?”

Pressure builds behind my eyes as my throat clogs with the emotions I’ve been trying to tamp down for far too long. Glancing over at Katie, the way her features soften as she takes me in tells me everything is present on my face right now. She’s reading me like a fucking book.

“I don’t know, maybe.” My voice cracks over the words.

“Oh, E…”

“It’s fine,” I tell me more than her. “It’s not a big deal.”

“Do you think he has feelings for you?”

“All signs seem to point toward yes but, truthfully, don’t know.”

Grabbing the bottle, she uncaps it and downs another shot, handing it to me. “And what about the wife?”

At the mention of my mom, the guilt hits me again. The guilt that comes from my non-guilt. Why don’t I feel bad about doing these things with him? Am I a monster? A sociopath with no emotions?

“We don’t really talk about her.”

I don’t know if that makes the situation more or less fucked up.

“Listen, I will be whatever person you need me to be right now,” Katie mutters. “But before I put on whatever cap you need me to wear, I feel like, as your family, I need to—at least once—tell you that you deserve so much more than being someone’s sidepiece.”

Pulling my legs up, I wrap my arms around my knees, fully knowing she’s right. “I know,” I mumble. “I need to stop entertaining whatever this is between us. Put a full stop to it.”

“Not to sound gross and cliche, but there are so many men out there. You will find someone who loves and respects you, who isn’t already tied down to somebody else. I just know it.”

Resting my cheek on my knees, I smile. “Thanks, Katie.”

“And if that person just so happens to be Jordan, then so be it,” she adds.

“Oh my God. We arefriends!”

“Mmhm. We’ll see about that.” She winks. “Do you think he’d be my friend too?” She uses finger quotations around the wordfriend. “Those dimples do something to me. You wouldn’t mind, right?”

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