Page 84 of Kismet

“What’s with the scowl, baby bro?”

Shoving past her, I stop in the foyer and kick off my shoes. “Oh, I don’t know, Mol. Maybe the fact that it’s raining cats and fucking dogs out, and I’m soaked and cold.”

“Okay, grouch. Do you want to change into some of Julian’s clothes? He’s not home, but he won’t mind.”

“Sure,” I grumble. “Thank you.”

After I get changed into dry clothes that are two sizes too large, Molly throws my clothes in the dryer, and we head to the kitchen. She hands me a whiskey on the rocks and pins me with an inquisitive look.

“Now, how about we try this again. What’s got you in such a funk? And don’t you dare say the rain, because a little rain has never gotten you like this before.”

Throwing back a big swig, I relish in the burn as I swallow. I set the glass on the counter and run both hands down my face, sighing. “Cash came to my office this morning and told me everything that happened between us on Saturday was a mistake. I guess it hit me harder than I thought it would.”

“Stone, I’m sorry. Did you want there to be more than what it was?”

“You know the answer to that, Mol. Don’t make me say it.” I toss back another swallow.

“I know you don’t want to hear it, but I really think you need to open up to him about everything.”

“What good will that do? He’s still not going to forgive me or move past it.”

“You don’t know that.”

“Yes, Molly. I do know that. I know him. Once you fuck it up with him, that’s it. There’s no second chance.” My head falls into my palms as I try, but fail, to get past this shit. Get over it once and for all.

“I think if that were actually the truth, he wouldn’t have been at that party on Saturday at all. If he—truly in his heart—was closed off to the possibility of anything with you, he never would’ve come. I know you don’t believe me, Stone, but I saw the way he looked at you.”

“I don’t know, Mol.”

“You can’t beat yourself up forever. Yes, you hurt him, but at the time, you did what you thought you needed to do. You were dealt a shitty hand, and you reacted the only way you knew how. Even if you had stayed, you wouldn’t have been any good to him in the state you were in. Forgive yourself… finally.”

“I can’t help but resort to feeling angry towardher. If she hadn’t been so selfish, none of this would’ve happened, and he and I could’ve had a chance.”

“How you’re feeling is valid and understandable. Have you talked to Corrine about it?”

“No.”

The soft smile that grazes her face is full of love. I know she means well, but fuck, I don’t want to go there.

“Think about it, at least. Talking to her would help, and I think you know that.”

“I hate you sometimes.” The smirk on my face gives me away.

“No, you don’t. You just hate that I’m right.” She sticks her tongue out at me before getting dinner out of the oven. “You know Julian and I went throughhellto get where we are today. We didn’t get here by avoiding our feelings or wallowing in self-pity.”

Chapter Thirty

Cash DeMarco

“You look handsome tonight, Cash!”

“Thanks, Stella. You look nice as well.”

It’s Saturday night and I’m stuck at this fundraiser for the University. It’s black tie, stuffy, and I’d rather be anywhere other than here. Luckily, I haven’t run into Stone yet, but it’s only a matter of time. He’s one of the speakers, and it’s mandatory for all faculty to be here. It’s been almost two weeks since I stormed out of his office after I told him our hook-up was a mistake.

I’m still so fucking mad at myself for hooking up with him. For putting myself in the position for that to happen. I should’ve known better. Idofucking know better, dammit.

And now I feel like I’m back at square one. It’s like when he left five years ago all over again… except he didn’t leave. He’s here. I have to see him—not every day, but close enough.

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