Page 101 of Finding Home with You

“So,” he says, grinning at me as he lifts his glass. “I say we do it.”

“Fuck,” I say, letting out a deep breath. “You’re sure?” I ask even though he’s just agreed to it.

Beck nods. “I’m positive,” he says. “I mean we’ll have to talk to Finn, but I can’t imagine he’ll think any different. So…” he pauses and holds up his whisky to me. “Congratulations, partner.”

I laugh as I clink my glass against his.

“Well?” Erin asks the second I walk in the front door. She’s jumping from foot to foot in the hall, as excited as a child on Christmas morning.

I laugh, taking her hands in mine. “Beck’s in,” I say.

Erin screeches with excitement, pressing up on her toes and planting kisses all over my face.

“Hang on, Red,” I say, grinning. “He’s still gotta run it by Finn first. It’s not a done deal.”

“Ah, Finn will be fine,” Erin says with a wave of her hand. “He’s always bitching about the food in that place anyway. He’ll love the idea.”

I laugh as I pull her against me, smiling down at her as I start to believe this new life I’ve dreamt about, the one I confided in to Erin so many weeks ago, might actually become a reality.

There was never any doubt in my mind about my attraction to Erin, or the way I felt about us. I mean my desire for her was off the charts from the second we met each other and not just in the naked way. It just always felt impossible to believe we could actually find our way to a place where we were both happy, where we had everything we wanted.

Between all the shit that was flying around, the stuff with Anthony and her dad; the fear she’s spent the last ten or so years living with, I just never thought we’d get there. And it blows my mind that she is finally safe now. That I can offer her a life that I know she’s always wanted.

“Wait,” Erin says, pulling back a little. “Did you tell Beck about the…” her hand goes to her stomach. “I haven’t told Kelsey, fuck, I should be the one to tell her.”

“Relax, babe,” I say, kissing her forehead. “I didn’t say anything. No one but my family knows. Well and my boss,” I add, remembering my confession on the phone last night. “I wasn’t sure how you wanted to tell them all,” I add, shrugging.

Erin smiles up at me, her face alive with so much happiness. “Oh, I know the perfect time to do it,” she says, before throwing her arms around my neck and kissing me.

Epilogue

Christmas Eve

Erin

I stop just before the expanse of the wrap around porch. It sparkles brilliantly under the glow of millions of tiny white lights, and I smile at all the memories that come back to me in this moment.

When you have no family, holidays can be a lonely and depressing time, but I have always been lucky enough to have Kelsey and Finn in my life. There hasn’t been a Christmas Eve where I haven’t been at the inn surrounded by the people who have become my family.

“You nervous?” Ryan asks, his arm slipping around my shoulders as a waft of steam leaves his mouth and floats around in front of us. A light dusting of snow is falling around us making everything look like this idealized version of Christmas.

“Not at all,” I respond, leaning into Ryan’s body and committing to memory this moment.

“Why are you stopping then?”

I let out a long slow breath; finally feeling like I can breathe again, like the constant worry, that heavy ache in my chest is gone. I never thought there would be a better feeling than relief, but as I stand here in the cold with Ryan next to me, the feeling of true happiness trumps everything.

“I want to remember this moment forever,” I tell him as I close my eyes and take a deep breath trying to remember the smell of wood burning and the clean scent that snow gives off. I want to remember what the inn looks like and the way Ryan’s body feels against mine. Because after everything I’ve been through, this is where my new beginning is, where my family is complete.

Ryan opens the door to the inn and we both stop for a second to take in the beautiful décor. Kelsey has once again outdone herself and I often wonder why the inn hasn’t been featured in magazines.

A twelve-foot tall Christmas tree stands in the center of the room, accentuating the height of the already tall ceilings. It’s beautifully decorated in reds and silvers along with everything else in the inn.

The dining room is already packed with people; tourists and locals, since this is the only place in town that is open on Christmas Eve.

Looking around I spot Kelsey at the round table in the corner that she reserves for us every year. She’s chatting with Pop, Beck by her side as she leans into him and smiles.

It’s funny how much has changed in just a few short years. There was a time when it was just Kelsey and me here together. Slowly Finn joined us and eventually Pop too. But with Beck back and Ryan moving to Rockport our little group is slowly growing.

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