Page 35 of Consummation

Sarah motions like I just proved her case.

“Yeah, you’re probably right.” I rub my forehead and sigh. “The funny thing is I totally would have said yes if Josh’s proposal had been even the slightest bit from his heart—just the teeniest, tiniest bit.”

“I gotta be honest, Kat, from what you’ve told me, I don’t really understand what was so horrible about it. I mean, you said he acted like he was doing you a huge favor, but maybe you just misinterpreted him? I’m sure he was just freaking out.”

I pause, choosing my words. “Remember Mr. Darcy’s first proposal inPride and Prejudice?When he was like, ‘Oh, you’re so beneath me, Miss Elizabeth and I really shouldn’t do this because you’re from a disgraceful family and wanting to marry you goes against all reason and logic and willbesmirchmy good name—but, hey, will you marry me?’”

Sarah chuckles. “Yes, I remember it well because you’ve made me watch that movie, like, three times with you.”

“Well, it was just like that. ‘Oh, Kat. I have no desire to marry you whatsoever and I’m doing you ahugefavor and I don’t want our childat alland you’re soluckyI’m asking you because I’msorich and amazing, but, hey, will you marry me?’” I wave my hands in the air. “It totally sucked donkey balls.”

Sarah nods. “Sounds pretty shitty.”

“And not only that, he had the audacity to ask me if the baby is his.” My cheeks turn hot at the memory.

Sarah shrugs. “Okay, you just lost me. Why was that such a dastardly thing to ask?”

I’m appalled. “Sarah, he was basically calling me a slut.”

“Uh,no, he was asking if the baby is his. Not quite the same thing as calling you a slut.”

“Josh is the only guy I’ve been with and he knows it,” I say, full of indignation.

“Oh, well, then, you’re absolutely right: Josh should never have double-checked the baby he was about to support for the rest of his life, financially and otherwise, is definitely his.” Sarah shoots me ascolding look. “Cut him a little slack, honey—I’m sure Josh was just totally blindsided. Plus, you’d be the first to admit you’re no virgin. I don’t blame Josh for at least asking the question, Kat. I really don’t.”

I open my mouth to refute her, but then I shut it. God, I hate it when it turns out I’ve been wrong about something. “Why are youalwaysso damned nice, Sarah?” I ask. “It’s really annoying.”

“I’m not that nice.”

“Please don’t say that. Because if you’re not really, really nice, then that means I’m really, really bitchy.”

Sarah laughs. “Okay, I’m really, really nice.”

The door opens and my doctor, a slender woman with brown skin and salt and pepper hair, enters the room.

“Hi, Doctor Gupta,” I say, shaking her hand. “This is my best friend, Sarah—soon to be Auntie Sarah.”

The doctor shakes Sarah’s hand and smiles at me. “Are you ready to see your baby, Kat?”

“Heck yeah. How about you Auntie Sarah? You ready to see your niece or nephew?”

Sarah squeals and claps.

After spreading some gel on my stomach, the doctor runs the wand of the sonogram machine over my stomach, and a swirling image of what might as well be outer space comes up onscreen.

“What’s that?” I ask, pointing.

“One moment,” the doctor says, maneuvering. “Okay. This is your uterus, Kat. And right there? That’s your baby.”

“Wow,” Sarah says, putting her hand to her mouth.

“That’s mybaby?” I ask.

“Yep. He or she is just about the size of a grape.”

I look at Sarah. “My baby’s a grape.”

“Grape Ape,” Sarah says.

---