Page 50 of River & Crown
"I can learn to like my wife as long as she loves me. What do you say, Crown? I've tasked Honor with finding me a bride, but it seems he is dragging his feet."
"It's only been six months."
"Six months too long. I have pressing matters that only a wife can solve."
"What pressing matters, and why am I just now hearing about them?" I questioned my brother.
"Simmer down, Emersyn. My issues have nothing to do with you."
"Oh, but everyone else can be involved," I smacked.
"I gave you a chance to find me a wife, but you declined."
"That's before I knew there was an actual reason for you wanting one."
"Helping someone doesn't have to be justified with a reason, Emersyn," Killian spoke like the true asshole he was.
"That's rich coming from you," I snipped, rolling my eyes.
"My assistance comes with a price because my reach is longer than most, yet with you, it's free of charge. Are you saying I don't deserve the same in return?"
"No, I... " I let my voice fade away, not really knowing what I planned to say in the first place.
"Exactly. Go wash up for dinner."
"Boy fuck you, I'm grown!"
"With ways of a child."
Sucking my teeth, I shoved Rize's gun into his chest. He lowly grunted, brushing his hand across mine. I didn't miss the way my clit pulsed when we touched, but now wasn't the time. Instead of going to wash up, I strutted my pretty ass out the front door. Killian keeping secrets was new for me. I was so used tobeing his walking diary that I never once thought about how I might feel if things changed.
A psychiatrist once called us co-dependent in a therapy session. I laughed in her face as Killian sat there with Grim and Ghost at his side. That was our first and last session with that lady. Mainly because when she went home that night, I was waiting for her with a Lorazepam cocktail. While she drifted in and out of consciousness, her words slurring and incoherent, I told her all my innermost thoughts. Killian's name was reoccurring probably because, in a way, Killian is my life purpose. My innermost thoughts died with the psychiatrist after I slit her wrist. The Teixeira name was too prestigious for anything I said to get out, so she had to die.
Chapter 12
River Ashland
Glancing toward the open street, I hummed along with the growl of the engines that pulsed through the air like an unsaid promise. The roaring of the night was courtesy of the countless muscle cars with V8 engines and motorcycles that burned rubber along the pavement with power and precision. The vibes I was used to welcoming with open arms felt different tonight. Physically, I was here, sitting on the hood of my car, waiting for my race to be called. My inner consciousness was light years away, stuck in the past. The rattling of my nerves felt all too familiar, like I was back at my first race, too nervous to press the gas, and Sincere was doing his best to talk me into acting recklessly. The stench of gasoline and burnt rubber surrounded me but lacked the comfort I was used to. Now, the scent churned my stomach and dredged up a panic I thought I'd buried long ago. The feeling clawed at me, tightening my chest in a way that made breathing a chore.
Am I scared?
I pondered the feeling, desperately searching for a reason as fear sped through my veins like tires skidding against the pavement. This wasn't my first race. It wasn't even my twentieth. I was well within pro status after the number of wins I'vecollected racing. Yet here I was, chilling, parked on the edge of the street with my heart beating too fast, fighting against the weight of something I didn't understand.
"River, are you okay?" Hearing Honey's voice brought my gaze to her. My lips trembled as I parted them to speak.
Do I lie? Do I tell the truth?
"Uh yeah, I'm fine," I forced out, still a little shaken up.
"You sure? Want me to get you a water? The weather is nice, but not nice enough for you to sweat."
I swiped my hand across my forehead, and sure enough, beads of sweat coated the back of my hand.
"No, I'm fine."
Dissatisfaction plowed her brows. I forced a smile, hoping that would get her off my case.
"Mhm, don't make me call Crown."
