Page 92 of Ecliptic

The thought alone filled me with fear, but I had to try. The fate of our futures depended on it.

The walk to Takoda’s dome was heavy and filled with trepidation. With each step, my lungs grew tighter, and my palms dampened. I’d resisted speaking with the healer for so long, grasping onto some form of independence, or was it stubbornness? I refused to face the fact that I might need more help, that all answers weren’t within me, or maybe they were, but I couldn’t hear them within my own echo chamber.

If it were pride, there was no place for it in a world hanging on by a thread.

My hands trembled as I reached to knock, but just before my knuckles met the latticed wood, the circular door opened, and Rowen stood in the threshold.

“Are you all right? Is everything okay?” he asked, his eyes wide with concern. I thought he would be finished with his mind-mending therapy by now, but they must have gone over.

“Yes. Everything is fine. I came by to see if Takoda had any time for me today,” I replied, nervously stroking the laces of my vest.

Rowen’s expression softened as his gaze caressed mine.

Takoda peered his head through the door. “For you, star-touched, always. Please come in,” he said as he held the door open for me, his eyes kind and never judging.

Taking a deep breath, I walked past Rowen, my gaze never leaving him. “I love you.”

“I know,” he replied as I crossed the threshold, and I realized I’d never entered Takoda’s dome willingly. I’d always beencarried in here while I was unconscious. Somehow, taking the steps for myself filled me with a sense of strength.

The healer’s dome was overflowing with living plants, herbs, and natural medicines. Vines trickled down, and dried plants hovered above. I took in a deep breath, letting the scents fill my lungs. I was finally facing what I could no longer ignore.

“Um,” I said, wringing my hands. “Where should I sit?”

“You can sit anywhere you like,” Takoda said, waving his hand around the room in invitation.

Sitting on the bedroll where I’d been a patient didn’t feel right. There were chairs and stools I could choose instead, but the act of sitting down to speak sent a fresh wave of anxiety up my spine.

I wasn’t afraid of Takoda by any means, but I’d sworn off lying on a couch and gushing my feelings to anyone ever again, but the time had come. And I trusted Takoda with my life.

“Should we go for a walk instead?” the healer asked, somehow sensing my apprehension of sitting down.

I released a heavy breath. “That would be nice.”

We walked the organic pathways that slowly came back to life from the renewed water.

“I’m glad the water is running,” I said to the healer, unsure what else to say.

“It is not just the water that returns life. It is also you,” Takoda replied, noting the glowing flowers that bloomed as I walked by.

“I . . . I might bring life, but I’ve also brought death. And . . . and I almost killed everyone in the Crypts,” I said, tears burning in my eyes. I hadn’t said it out loud—hadn’t even really known that was what was affecting me until the words poured out. “How can I ever forgive myself for almost killing thousands of people?” I confessed as I let the tears fall; now that they had started, it was too late to stop.

“In the Crypts, when I tried to hit the false queen with my Light, I missed. I swore I wanted to strike her directly, but instead, my blast hit the ceiling and caused a cave-in. I almost killed everyone.”

Takoda walked beside me, matching my pace. “The spirits could have guided your hand, knowing what was best,” he said, his kind umber eyes sparkling with understanding. “Did you ever suspect it might have been the gentle brush of an Elder Spirit? That you were meant to bring the Crystal Crypts down? Tosaveeveryone trapped within?”

I let out a hiccup. Why hadn’t I thought of that?

The shame had been too thick and heavy to think through. My guilt had shut out any form of rationale.

I had accepted the Elder Spirits help before. The giant, foxlike guardian who had saved me from being ripped and clawed to death in the mangroves. And again when they reforged me as an Ancient Elve.

It made so much sense. The Elder Spirits had been helping me all along the way.

“The Crypts weren’t meant to be escaped,” I barely whispered.

“But you escaped them. Along with freeing everyone imprisoned within their clutches.”

“I was meant to destroy the Crypts?”

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