Page 6 of Long Live the King

Chef Zach said, “Fraoch, I promise, there are no gators, you know why?”

“Because ye are telling me a story?”

“No, because it is too cold for them. They hate the cold. That’s why they never build snowmen, right Zoe?” She giggled.

Fraoch grinned. “This is why the gators daena live in Scotland!”

Zach said, “Exactly, they don’t want to live in Scotland and the gators damn sure don’t want to eat a Scot. Too cold. They like a warmer, sweatier dinner.”

“I always knew a proper Scotsman wasna meant tae live with those monstrous beasts.” He relaxed and sank down on the tube, allowing his arse tae submerge intae the water in the middle of the tube. “All ye gators daena bite m’arse, tis a cold arse, ye canna hae any!”

The boys thought Fraoch was hilarious.

He said, “Isla, did ye hear? If ye want tae put yer arse in the water, ye can. Tis good tae taunt the gators with our primacy. We are the Scots, and this is cold water. If ye dangle yer butt and fart in the water the gators will feel sorry for themselves.”

Isla said, “That’s okay, Uncle Fraoch, I don’t want to make the gators feel bad.”

He feigned upset. “Isla! Ye take it back! Ye ken the gators want tae feel bad — they are monsters, they thrive on grumpiness.”

She giggled and adjusted her weight, her heel digging into my rib. I pushed her a bit and she grabbed hold even harder. “You almost knocked me off, Da!”

I laughed. “Ye ought tae go in the water, Isla. Tae hae fun, ye need tae get wet.”

She shook her head. “I am not ready, Da, these things take time.”

At the end of the float downstream we bumped against the landing dock. We dragged our raft and tubes tae shore, climbed out, and began wrapping ourselves in towels.

Isla stood on the side of the riverbank with her hands on her hips lookin’ verra disappointed with herself. I asked, “What are ye doin’, Isla?”

“Nothing, Da,” she huffed. “Just thinking about how much fun we had.”

We wandered up tae the van tae get juice boxes from the cooler, and I watched her, as she jabbed her straw in her box, as her chin trembled.

I texted Kaitlyn on m’phone:

How is Jack?

His fever broke, he’s all good, did you boys have fun?

I chuckled, thinking about how Isla was talking about fun.

Quentin and James tossed our towels intae the back of the van. Chef Zach passed out snacks tae everyone. Isla looked down on her juice box with deep melancholy.

I called Kaitlyn and said, “Isla wants tae tell ye about her day.” I put the phone on speaker and held the phone for Isla.

Isla said, “Hi Mammy.”

“Did you have fun?”

Isla burst intae tears.

I heard Kaitlyn’s voice say, “Uh oh.”

Isla wailed.

Kaitlyn said, “Let me guess, my love, you didn’t go in the water.”

Isla sniffled and said, “It wasn’t the right time, Mammy.”

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