Page 102 of Love me Like XO

Hell naw, I wasn’t offering conversation. If his old ass wanted to talk to me, then he could address me.

“Straight, I’m about to go back here and get me something to eat, before big mama closes the kitchen on my ass.”

A brief and uncomfortable silence filled the space, before my father slid his ass in the seat next to me.

“I miss you, Em. I know I fucked up, baby girl but let an old man fix it.”

I turned my head, looking at him for a few moments before the pitiful expression on his face along with Zero’s words earlier made me nod my head. “Yeah, I guess I miss you too, old man.”

Laughter escaped his lips. “That’s all I’ma get, huh?”

“For now.”

He nodded. “A start. How are you and my grandchildren.”

“Feels like I’m fighting for my life in this body, Daddy. Babies beating my ass for being out here like I’m grown.”

He laughed. “You don’t have that long to go.”

“Still too long, I miss working, miss being able to leave the house lighter.”

His laughter never stopped, as I filled him in. Truth of the matter is I missed my father more than anything, but I wasn’t ready to let things go. At this point I didn’t have a choice. Carrying around anger and all of that wasn’t doing shit but draining my already dwindling ass energy. He and I talked for a while, somewhat catching up on everything he was missing.

“Life felt incomplete not talking you and your sister. You know she’s riding for you regardless of anything.”

“Ree is?—”

“Your protector. She told my ass one day, if gang gang ain’t fucking either you, I can’t neither big homie.” He chuckled while he told me about it.

I couldn’t help but laugh while once again allowing my eyes to gloss the space looking for my baby father. Almost like amagnet my eyes had found his, finally. They were lower than when I last saw him. He was high, moving slowly toward me with a piece of cake on a paper plate. It was for me, I knew it was because he didn’t really do sweets unless they were off my plate.

“Do you love him?” my father’s question caught me kind of off guard.

I turned my attention from Zero to my father and nodded. “So much that sometimes I gotta remind myself to slow down.”

He laughed. “Love doesn’t have a pause or slow down button, baby.”

“I know, but sometimes I wish it did because I love him, love him…like really love him.”

Before my father could respond, Zero was standing in front of me with the cake I didn’t ask for, but he knew I wanted.Love read my mind and brought me cake.

MALIK -A FEW DAYS LATER

It was my lucky day when we pulled up to Ree’s mom’s place and saw who her husband was. Paul Givens was an easy ass mark, because before I pulled away from his house I had already given his information to Gram. The assignment was simple, just watch the motherfucker and memorize his routines. As a matter of fact, he was supposed to be laying low after the shit storm with Celia and the gang. I guess this was his idea of laying low, going home and beefing with his people.

“You don’t think Ree will know if he all of a sudden comes up missing?” Zero asked.

We were at the bar chopping it up and spit balling a plan. The way I see it is, his mark ass would be easy as long as he didn’t try to treat this mess with us like a clean case. That meant as long as there was no paperwork with any of our information and or names on it then we were good. That’s what had us waiting, orat a fucking standstill. I was waiting for my nigga Marbles to get back to me.

“How the fuck will she know? She barely speaks to those fucking people. As a matter of fact she doesn’t even talk to her sister like that. Old dude’s death won’t affect her one way or another.” I shrugged.

“You sure.”

“Not to mention the lil’ sister’s nigga straight up threatened his ass. Lil hot head nigga from over east. Practically told his ass he’d end ‘em.”

Zero nodded. “Shit, if that’s what you say. However as well he won’t be the motherfucker ending him, you will.”

“But she doesn’t know that. And as far as I’m concerned she doesn’t have to. It isn’t like he’s her father or she even remotely cares about him,” I reasoned with him aloud while convincing myself that my decision wouldn’t at any point affect Taree. Maybe I needed to talk to her, shit run it by her with all the facts. Problem is I didn’t want to involve her in my shit, never wanted to put her in jeopardy because she knew too much.

---