Page 10 of College Town

Somewhere in the middle of taking fifteen minutes to describe a ten second encounter, he drinks half his wine, sets it aside, and starts twisting his hands together in his lap.

“He recognized me,” he says to the rug, like an admission, half-hopeful, half-sick. “He said my name.”

When he risks a glance upward, they’re both watching him with sympathy, Leo’s polite, Dana’s far too knowing.

Leo says, hesitantly, “That’s a good thing that he remembers you. Right?” He looks between the two of them.

“No,” says Lawson.

“Yes,” says Dana.

She makes a face. “What’s worse: the pain of him remembering and having to talk? Or him caring so little that he doesn’t recognize you at all?”

“Fuckingouch.”

“Yeah.”

“Shit.” He scrubs both hands down his face, for all that helps. “What’s he doing here? In Eastman – in my coffeeshop? Looking like he owns Wall Street, or, fucking, runs the mafia or some shit. He was wearing ablackshirt and aredtie. His suit hadpinstripes, Dana. Pinstripes.”

“So you’ve said. Not to pass judgement, but you’d know what he was doing in town if you’daskedhim–”

“Ha!Askedhim. That’s a good one!”

“Lawson,” she says in a measured tone that he knows means she’s trying not to sigh.

“Dana,” he parrots back.

“I said you could haveaskedhim, that doesn’t mean you had to drop trou and go at it across the Coffee Town counter.”

Leo chokes and spits a little wine down his chin that he mops with his sleeve.

“Don’t scandalize your boyfriend to death,” Lawson says, though he feels color bloom in his own cheeks. The idea of that –drop trou;across the counter– could give him a heart attack, so he decisively shoves it aside.

“No.” Leo coughs, and dabs his chin some more. “It’s fine, I’m fine. You’re fine.”

“He is fine,” Dana says, “except for the fact that he turned tail and ran away from his high school crush instead of speaking to the man like an adult.”

She realizes what she said – high school crush – the same moment the words hit Lawson’s gut like a sucker punch and knock all the breath from his lungs.

She sits forward. “Shit, I didn’t mean–”

He holds up one hand in an attempt at anit’s finegesture, and plucks his wine glass up with the other. It’s a thick, chemical-tasting Merlot not meant to be chugged, but chug it he does. When he lowers his glass, Dana is biting her lip, contrite, and Leo is striding back into the room with one of the bottles of white, bottle faintly opaque with condensation from the fridge.

“Thanks,” Lawson gasps, catching his breath, and holds out his glass for Leo to fill.

“Law,” Dana says, voice sad now. “You know I didn’t mean it that way. Like–”

“No, you’re right.” He stares into his glass so he doesn’t have to see the pity in her gaze. “That’s what it was. A high school crush.”

6

You can write hundred of pages, and still never come up with the handful of words that could make someone understand the shape of your love.

~*~

Tommy Cattaneo of the big, galaxy-brown eyes, and the stubborn chin, new kid, turned out to be a twin. A fraternal twin, he stressed, and that became apparent on Tommy’s second day of school when said twin – Noah – showed up at their lunch table.

Lawson looked from Tommy to Noah and back again, and said, “Jeez, looks like he got all the nutrients in the womb, huh?”

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