Page 93 of Lone Star

“Have I given youthat muchof a wrong impression?”

“I…” She hadn’t everthoughtof it that way. Hadn’t ever suspected that he placed a greater value on the babies than he did on her – but she could see now, with an ugly realization, whyhemight think that, given what she’d just said. “I thought,” she tried again, “you thought I was weaker. After.”

Somehow, his eyes widened another fraction. And then he closed them, and massaged the bridge of his nose with thumb and forefinger: weary, frustrated, ashamed.

Silence between them, a long moment. Michelle wasn’t sure how to fill it; wanted to choose her words carefully to keep from making all of this worse.

Candy dropped his hand, and stared at her, face terribly open, now. His voice was low, contained within the room, but it carried straight to her. “Baby. I promise I’ve never thought you were weak. Notever. Having TJ…I’d pretty much given up on having kids. It wasn’t something I thought about anymore. It just wasn’t in the cards. And then you came along, and I loved you so much, and we started a family, and I loved you even more. I love you more every damn day.

“I don’t think you get weaker,” he said. “But I do. I’m the one going soft. Every time I think ‘what if something happens to her?’ I get a little more scared.”

“Oh,” she said, softly.

He returned to his chair, head down, gaze on his clasped hands. “I don’t mean to be a big ass about it all the time. Or act like you can’t handle yourself.” He turned to her, uncertainty plain in the notch between his furrowed brows. “But I worry all the time, baby. It’s one thing to be in this life by yourself. It’s another to think the life might get the person you love most hurt.”

Her heart clenched. “I get it,” she said, and she did. “I think that ended up being Dad’s problem, in the end, when he sent me away.” She could feel the way her smile was rueful.

“So I’m your dad now.Greeeeaaat.”

Her smile tugged wider, real amusement washing through her. “Definitely not.”

He made a face.

She touched his shoulder again, and there was no shiver this time. She set her chin down on the back of her hand, so her face was right at his, her mouth right at his ear. “My father doesn’t make me want to take my clothes off,” she whispered, chuckling when he groaned.

“God, your family’s fucked up.”

“Including you?” she asked with false innocence.

He turned his head a fraction, the close grain of his evening stubble grazing her cheek, even that small intimacy sending a thrill down her back.

“Well, yeah,” he said, his voice shifting, finally, touched with humor, with his Texas grandeur, like the real him. “I’ve gotta be the most fucked up of all. Cradle robber,” he said, ticking attributes off on his fingers. “Yank,” he said in a terrible attempt at her accent, which left her laughing. “And not just Yank, but Texan.” He sobered, suddenly; she felt the tension ripple through his body. “Too stupid to realize the cartel was moving in on his territory again.”

“Not stupid,” she insisted. “Who could have known? That isn’t anything you’ve ever seen before – people being killed like that.”

“Drugged, too,” he added. “They’re using some kinda new paralytic, Cantrell said; something the lab hasn’t ever seen before. That’s how they’re getting the vics in place before they cut their throats.”

She frowned. “Why in the world would they be working with a drug like that? That’s what government assassins use.”

They both picked up their heads and looked at one another, both their gazes wide-eyed.

“You don’t think…” she started.

“That this is a government conspiracy?” Candy asked. “No, not really. But I know if you wanna get rich, you sell the kinda shit that makes people feel good. If you’re paralyzing people, it’s for a whole other reason.”

“Jesus,” she murmured. “Yeah. We’ll ask Fox. He would have some idea.”

“Or those weirdo kids of his.”

“Hmm. Tenny especially. Heisa government assassin. Or was.”

Candy nodded. “You had a chance to talk to him yet?”

“No. I don’t think Albie trusts him.”

“He’s kind of a dick, from what I’ve seen,” Candy said. “Then again, so are most of your uncles.”

She swatted his arm, and he chuckled.

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