Page 72 of The Magic of Provence

Christophe put his wine glass down on the table. He straightened and then took a step closer to her and he still had that smile and a look in his eyes that made her think he could see right into her soul.

‘You don’t have to give birth to a baby to be the mother,’ he said. ‘Look at Ellie and Theo.’

‘No…’ The word was desperate. ‘You don’t understand. It’s not that I can’thavebabies. It’s…’

Words failed her completely as panic slid out of hidden spaces. She couldn’t say anything more. She couldn’t bear what Christophe would think of her if he knew. She had sworn she would never tell anyone. It was a terrible secret she had to take to her grave.

The furrows on Christophe’s forehead were a clear indication that he still didn’t understand. Was he thinking that Fi simply didn’t want a baby? That she had no ambition to be a mother? He was Italian and adored his family, so of course he wouldn’t understand that.

Behind Christophe, Fi could see Ellie coming out of the house. Theo was beside her, with a tear-streaked face and a plaster on his knee. Ellie came straight to Fi and scooped Bonnie out of her arms.

‘Sorry about that,’ she said. ‘I know you don’t really do babies.’

‘It’s fine,’ Fi managed. ‘She’s the bonniest wee bairn ever. You picked the perfect name.’

‘We did, didn’t we?’ Ellie lifted her baby to kiss her. ‘And it’s part French as well as Scottish.Bonnefor good.’ She kissed Bonnie again. ‘But you’re better than good, aren’t you,ma poupée? You’re justperfect…’

She looked up at Fi. ‘We could see Bouton out of the window when we were upstairs washing Theo’s knee. Is she okay?’

‘What do you mean?’

Christophe had turned away to pick up his wine glass, the sound of laughter from Julien and Noah clearly pulling him back to his friends, but he turned back swiftly as he heard the concern in Fi’s voice.

‘She’s just lying in the middle of the olive grove. Sound asleep. As flat as a pancake. We saw Marguerite go and sniff her. She might have even nudged her but she still didn’t wake up.’

Fi’s gaze caught Christophe’s, her heart sinking like a stone.

Something didn’t feel right.

Ellie must have seen the flash of fear in her eyes as she realised that something might be wrong. She touched Theo’s head and said something about his papa that made him run towards the other end of the terrace.

‘I’ll keep him here,’ she said, as Fi turned to go to the fence that separated this garden from the olive grove. ‘And Heidi.’

Christophe gave a single nod. He opened the gate for Fi and then clicked it shut behind them.

Fi was frozen, holding her breath for a long moment as she stared at the black shadow on the ground that was Bouton. A very still, lifeless-looking shadow. She felt Christophe take her hand and squeeze it. She could pull in a deep breath, now. And move again.

She could do this.

She could do anything, with Christophe beside her like this.

23

Bouton wasn’t dead.

She was, however, very sick.

Noah was left to cope with the barbecue alone. Christophe carried Bouton back into La Maisonette and Julien went to fetch both their medical kits. Ellie and Laura looked after the children next door. And Fi…?

Fi knelt as close as she could to the little donkey foal who had stolen such a large part of her heart over the last few months. When Christophe had finished shining a torch into Bouton’s eyes and checking the colour of her gums and had his stethoscope against her ribs, Fi wriggled closer so that she could keep Bouton’s head on her lap and stroke her face and scratch her gently under her chin, just behind her muzzle with the smudge on top. It was one of Bouton’s favourite ways to be petted but she wasn’t about to nibble Fi’s arm or clothes with her velvety lips to let her know how much she was enjoying it. The effort of even lifting her head was too much. And then she coughed, a dry sound that was so unusual it made Fi blink.

‘How did she get so sick, so quickly?’ she asked, in disbelief. ‘I know she didn’t want much milk this morning but we’re well into weaning her, so I wasn’t worried. What did I miss?’

Christophe took out the earpieces of his stethoscope. ‘She’s got crackles in both her lungs,’ he told Fi. ‘She’s breathing too fast and her temperature’s high. I think she has pneumonia and that can be hard to spot until it becomes serious.’

‘Oh…God…’ Fi had to squeeze her eyes shut for a heartbeat. ‘I know how dangerous that is for foals.’

Bouton was in real danger of dying and Fi could feel her heart trying to break already.

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