Page 48 of The Magic of Provence

‘Poor Nonna.’

‘What?’ Christophe looked startled at the change of subject, as well he might. ‘Why?’

‘She wants thosebambinosso much.’ The children he never wanted to have. ‘No… what’s grandchildren in Italian?’

‘Nipoti.’ Christophe shrugged. ‘Nonna will be okay. She will live in hope as long as she thinks we are together.’

Ah…

It was a lightbulb moment for Fi that swiftly grew into an idea. A way to distract him from the sins of the past. Maybe even a new direction to a goal that had become even more important since she’d seen the way Christophe had been with that little boy at the restaurant. He would love to have his own children and they might be the luckiest kids on earth to grow up with this man as their father. She could hear an echo of something Ellie had said about him.

‘He might not even realise it himself, but he needs a family of his own.’

Fi’s tone was crisp. A decision was being made. A plan of distraction was forming. If nothing else, this would give them something to talk about on the drive back to La Maisonette.

‘We’ll have to make sure she does think that, then, won’t we?’

Christophe’s glance was bemused. ‘How?’

‘We can visit sometimes, but what would be even better is to let her know that we are together at other times. We can go places or do things.’

‘Like what?’

‘What do couples do in France in the summer? Go to beaches? Swim? Eat at lovely outdoor restaurants? We can take pictures and send them to her. Has she got a phone?’

‘Of course. She forgets to charge it sometimes but Mamma could share the pictures.’

Christophe was definitely distracted from memories of past emotional traumas. His eyes were brighter. He liked this idea. ‘She would love that,’ he said. ‘And she would know that you were being a good influence on me. I can be bad at keeping in touch often enough.’

Fi nodded. ‘That’s what we’ll do then. We’ll make it look like we’re together. We can help her hold onto the hope of somenipotifor as long as possible.’

They’d reached the car. Christophe opened all the doors and gave Heidi a bowl of water to give the car time to cool down.

He was beside the passenger door as Fi climbed in.

‘What about you,cara?’ he asked quietly. ‘I’ve seen you with your family and the babies. You love children, too, don’t you?’

Fi reached for her safety belt. ‘I do.’

She felt the car rock as Heidi jumped in. Christophe closed the back door but didn’t move to the driver’s side. He was standing there, looking at her.

‘You’d make a wonderful mother,’ he said, returning the compliment she’d given him.

Fi could feel herself freezing again. They were only words but they could feel like a physical touch. Like a tongue touching hers. She reached to pull her door shut, fighting the horrible current that was trying to drag her down into the clutches of a flashback.

‘Not going to happen,’ she said. She knew she was running again but this one was too big to face right now. It might always be. ‘I’ll never have my own babies.’ She shrugged to indicate there was nothing more that needed to be said. ‘I can’t.’

The door shut with more of a slam than she’d intended but it did the trick.

That particular conversation was over.

16

‘He wants to see you.’ Jeannie let her gaze rest for a beat on each of her three daughters in turn. ‘All of you.’

‘Nope.’ Laura’s voice was as pinched as her face. ‘Not going to happen.’

Jeannie could feel the force field of whatever protection her firstborn daughter was pulling around herself. She could understand why but, over the last few days, with the time she’d spent with Gordon Gilchrist in the hospital, she truly believed that this was the way forward. A chance to heal something that had been pushed out of sight and allowed to fester for far too long.

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