Page 61 of One Night in Edinburgh

‘Well, that is a travesty.’ I chuckle. ‘You should start an online campaign to end this outrage. “#cucumbergate”.’

‘Maybe I will. Or maybe I’ll get a life and get over it. So… coffee?’

‘I’d love to, but I’m at my dad’s birthday lunch right now, and I can’t even make an excuse to leave early because I was late.’

‘That wasn’t because I kept you up till three a.m., was it?’

I try to keep my focus as the memories of what we were doing until three a.m. dance into my mind in the style of a particularly sexy mental tango.

‘Um… no, not at all.’ I clear my throat awkwardly. ‘It is the reason I’m considering having a snooze on the chaise longue in the restaurant toilets though.’

‘There’s a chaise longue in the toilets?’ His voice climbs half an octave, making me giggle. ‘Where are you having lunch? Holyrood Palace?’

‘No, obviously. I’m in a restaurant, called Malkin’s. It’s just off the bottom of Dundas Street.’

Jamie gives an appreciative whistle. ‘I know exactly where that is. Your family do like the finer things in life.’

‘Well, yes.’ I purse my lips. ‘But do note the fact that we’re having lunch here, not dinner. That’s my parents’ way ofpretendingthey live like the other half. They’d never fork out for a Michelin-star dinner for all of us, unless they’d saved for months, and it was areallyspecial event.’

‘Still. There are worse places to be.’

‘That is true. It’s a bit pretentious for my liking, but I do have a foodie streak in me, much as I don’t like to admit it. I’m loving that side of it.’

‘Good. Make the most of it. Just think about how the kids you look out for in your job don’t get opportunities like that. They’d probably give their right arm to have the experience you’re having right now. Not literally, of course, but you know what I mean.’

‘You know, I’ve never thought about it like that.’ I shift my position, and in trying to get comfortable, end up lying out on the chaise longue, though I’m careful to keep my shoes off it. ‘You do make me think, Jamie, you know that?’

‘I’m glad. It’s a shame you’re stuck there, because I’m only about a three-minute walk from you right now.’

I sit up suddenly. ‘I thought you said you’re at the supermarket?’

‘I am. In Broughton, not Leith,’ he clarifies.

‘Ah, right. Gosh that’s annoying…’ I pause as an idea flits through my mind. ‘Actually… I’ve just thought of something. Can I call you back in two minutes?’

I hang up and dash back to our table, where Kayleigh raises a judgemental eyebrow – a clear indication that she thinks I’ve been in the toilets far too long.

‘Where haveyoubeen?’ says Mikey. ‘You got the runs or something?’

‘Michael, please.’ My mum screws up her face in disgust.

‘No, I haven’t.’ I cuff the back of his head affectionately. ‘When I was in the toilets I saw that Jamie had messaged, so I called him back.’

‘Oh, for goodness’ sake.’ Kayleigh looks like she’s about to throw a fit. ‘Steph, could you at leasttryto be present at this meal?’

‘No, wait… you don’t understand. Turns out he’s just along the road. He wanted to meet me for a coffee and I told him I couldn’t because I’m here. Then I wondered… given you’re all so interested in him, would you all like to meet him now? He could join us for dessert and coffee if the restaurant is all right with it.’

‘Steph, I’m not sure about that,’ starts my mum. ‘It’s a little unorthodox for someone to “pull up a chair” at a restaurant like this.’

‘I think it’s a great idea.’ Kayleigh’s eyes light up like a python who has detected a particularly plump and juicy mouse; Mikey simply shrugs in a gesture that says he’s fine with it.

We all look to my dad; given it’s his birthday celebration, he should cast the deciding vote.

‘Why not,’ he says. ‘The more the merrier, eh? The waiting staff will be fine. I’ll tell them there will be a bit extra in their tip for the trouble. I’m keen to size up this young man you’ve been spending time with.’

Having secured my dad’s blessing – though his motives for agreeing aren’t quite what I was hoping for – my mum comes round to the idea pretty quickly. As I look around at my family’s eager and somewhat unsettling faces, I wonder if maybe I’ve had too much Champagne, and this isn’t such a good idea after all.

‘Well, go on then,’ my mum prompts me. ‘Call him back.’

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