Page 39 of Take a Moment

‘Well done to you all.’ She looks at each of us meaningfully in turn. ‘But especially well done to Alex, who hasn’t just grabbed the bull by the horns, she’s hurled it right in the direction we need to land.’

Somewhat uncomfortable receiving this level of praise in front of my team, I quickly change the subject. ‘Right, I’m pretty sure someone said the word pub. What are we waiting for? Let’s go.’

We finish packing up our things and make our way out of the building. Although I’m feeling exuberant about the great progress we’ve made, as well as excited to be having my first ever Friday drinks session with my new workmates, I feel myself flagging a little. The newness of the job is still taking its toll. But once we’re outside, I breathe in the warmish September air, absorbing the buzz that Friday has injected into the workers of Brindley Place, and I’m determined to push through.

How much my life has changed in just a few weeks. From the claustrophobic, limited state it had reached back in Glasgow, to the complete reinvention of myself here in Birmingham. Nobody here knows of my illness and I can plan for every situation, adapting the way I go about my life to fit with my medical needs without interference from my family or Sasha. I have, in preparation for this evening (and in true project manager style), already thought through how I’ll handle it.

We make our way across the plaza, chatting in that adrenaline-fuelled ‘Friday feeling’ kind of way. Aware that I’m still the newbie and careful not to step on any toes, I stick firmly to the role of participant, rather than driving the banter. Dhruv, it turns out, is resident joker on the team. We’re laughing helplessly at his re-enactment of a recent interaction with his mother – who doesn’t speak much English – when suddenly it’s like my foot seems to malfunction and I fall heavily onto the steps by the plaza’s fountain. I go down hard and a shooting pain rushes through me as my knee collides with the sharp edge of the step. It takes everything I have not to cry out in agony.

‘Alex. Shit. Are you OK?’ Dhruv doubles back and rushes to my aid, closely followed by Emmanuel.

‘I’m… yeah… oh, that was sore.’ I’m now sitting on the step, holding my injured knee, my face burning with embarrassment.

‘It is bad? You think you can walk? I can give you a piggy-back if you like.’

Thankfully, this kind-but-ridiculous suggestion has the effect of distracting me from my pain and my wounded pride.

‘That won’t be necessary.’ I laugh weakly. ‘I’m OK. Plus, I don’t think we’re quite there yet, do you?’

‘Didn’t know there were qualifying criteria for that. Seriously, Alex. I know people fall about laughing because of my incredible sense of humour, but I think you took it too far.’

‘Not sure that’s so helpful right now, Dhruv.’ Emmanuel swoops in from behind him. ‘Alex, are you really all right?’

‘I’m fine,’ I assure her. ‘Really. It was one of those falls where it’s far more painful in the moment.’

Helped up by Dhruv and Emmanuel, I dust myself down and spot Danielle standing with Felix and Aadesh. To say she is enjoying my unfortunate accident would be an understatement. Thankfully, the guys are not wearing similar expressions; they look as concerned as Dhruv and Emmanuel, but they’ve clearly decided I’m in good hands.

‘Can you walk all right?’ Emmanuel asks.

I put weight on my leg and automatically flinch as my injured knee protests about the movement. But there’s no way this is ruining my evening – especially as I’m painfully aware of why it happened in the first place. This time there’s no disputing it’s an unfortunate by-product of my MS. Every now and again, I seem to misjudge things spatially or my body doesn’t quite do what I expect it to. Not badly, but enough to bump my leg on a cabinet or have a minor trip of some kind. Normally I can cover it up, and no one notices. Today’s unfortunate incident obviously doesn’t fall into that category; this time I’ve gone down in style and I’m going to have a hell of a bruise to remind me of it. It’s a stark and grim reminder of my illness. However, I’m determined to rescue whatever pride I can from this situation.

‘I’m fine. Honestly.’ I bend and straighten my knee a few times to loosen it up. ‘Now let’s go before they give our table away.’

I don’t need to tell Emmanuel twice. She instinctively trusts me to handle this situation myself. If this had happened back home, my mother-slash-sister-slash-colleagues would be carting me off home in a taxi faster than Usain Bolt could reach the hundred-metre finish line.

We amble across the remainder of the plaza into the cluster of food and drink establishments on the canal-side of Brindley Place. Reaching the team’s regular drinking haunt, I quickly forget my hot, throbbing knee and soak up the ‘gateway to the weekend’ celebrations.

An hour later, we’re sat at a picnic-style table in the outdoor section of a trendy hipster cocktail bar, bathing in the remnants of the warmth from the day. The sun has sneaked behind the roof of the restaurant opposite, leaving us in no doubt that we’ll be heading indoors before long.

It turns out my colleagues are a lively bunch and quite different to how they are in the office. Either that or they’ve been on their best behaviour with me, and now they’re letting their true personalities filter through. Dhruv is very much the leader in this social context, using his humour to bring everyone together. Emmanuel is a solid figure within the group whom everyone clearly respects (even Danielle to a certain extent). She joins in the banter, giving the team space to enjoy themselves and forget they’re in the presence of their manager. Felix and Aadesh are less dominant characters, but they still get involved in the jokes and the laughter. It’s a really pleasant social dynamic and I find myself grinning like a new moon, happy to have found such positivity in my new life already.

‘I’ll get the next round in,’ Emmanuel announces. ‘Same again?’

We nod or confirm verbally as she gets up from her seat, her braided hair swishing around her shoulders, having been released from her ‘work bun’ as soon as we left the office.

‘Alex, are you going to have a proper drink this time?’ Dhruv teases me in a friendly manner. ‘We need to get you drunk so you don’t remember what we get up to this evening.’

‘I’d remember it regardless.’ I flash him a mischievous smirk. ‘Alcohol doesn’t affect my memory. I’ve got loads of drunken escapade collateral saved up over the years, ready to be wheeled out at any time – big birthdays, weddings,leaving speeches…’

He considers this with a glint of humour in his eyes. ‘Looks like you’re one to watch out for.’

‘Don’t worry. I only do it to people I don’t like.’

‘So, if you ever “red-neck” me publicly, I’ll know it’s because you secretly want to off me.’

‘Not at all. If I want to off you, no one will find you. You know I’m from Glasgow, right?’ I give him a cheeky wink as his face turns to one of white shock, then amusement.

‘You’regood.’ He hoots. ‘I know you’re just joking, but now I’m wondering if that’s a double bluff. I’ll be careful not to get on the wrong side of you.’

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