Page 107 of Eternally Yours
She comes to the opening of the bathroom and stops when she sees me, kneeling in front of the bowl as I gasp for air. My body convulses on its own. I drop back to the wall, no longer able to support myself when the room starts spinning. The tears keep pouring out, I can’t stop them.
It’s too much, my chest hurts. Everything hurt. I feel like I’m going to pass out.
“Oh, God! MORGAN!” she yells and rushes over to me, brushing the hair outof my face as she kneels in front of me. “What’s wrong, Cece? Talk to me. Tell me what happened.”
Seconds later, Milo bursts into the room with Morgan behind him. He tries to come to me, but Brey stops him and takes him away. Morgan sits beside me and takes me into her arms, putting my back to her chest.
“It’s okay, sweetie. You’re okay. I’m here with you.” She strokes my hair and rocks us back and forth, whispering the words over and over again in my ear.
“I... I can’t... breathe,” I croak out through my gasps and sobs.
“You can, you’re just having a panic attack. Focus on my voice and take deep breaths. In and out, in and out. Yeah, like that. You’re doing great. Keep going. You’re okay, we’ll get through this together. I promise. You’re okay,” she says soothingly.
Eventually, my breathing comes back down. From the corner of my eye, I see Aubrey bending down to pick up my phone and look at the lit screen. “Oh no...” Her eyes well with tears as she looks at us. And that’s all I need to break down all over again.
A wail projects from my mouth. Morgan tightens her hold on me, my body giving out in her arms, my soul giving up the fight. All I can do is cry and scream and beg for this all to stop. Beg for it to be a nightmare that I’ll wake up from.
But I don’t wake up.
And the pain never stops.
An hour later, my cries have finally subsided, at least for now. Morgan and Aubrey managed to get me downstairs to the couch with a blanket. They wanted to put me in my bed, but I refused.
It’s too painful being in there, everything reminds me of him. Everything in this house reminds me of him. But our bedroom, that was our favorite place. And right now, it just feels cold. Cold and empty...like me.
My mind has shut off. I’ve cried every tear from my body, and now I just lay here, numb. Everything hurts, yet I can’t feel anything at the same time. It’s a strange feeling, but I want this. I prefer this to the pain I felt earlier.
This is easier.
I’m so tired, yet I can’t sleep. My body has no more fight left in it, leaving only an empty shell of myself. Aubrey and Morgan sit by me, talk to me, but I don’t hear them. Nothing registers.
Nothing makes sense.
I’ve fallen into an abyss where everything is blank, darkness crawling in every corner. I welcome it, this emptiness. This nothingness. If it means to stop the pain,then I’ll let it consume me.
“Come on, Clay. Pick up, pick up, pick up,” Morgan says, holding the phone in front of her face. She’s sitting in the armchair, facing me as I lie on my side. I watch her but don’t say anything. Even if I tried, I don’t think I could.
I’m too tired.
Eventually, the call connects. “Finally!” Morgan explains.
“Babe? Is everything okay?” Clay says with a hoarse voice.
“No, everything is not okay!” Emotions fill her words. “Silas... he... oh my God, Clay. It’s all over the internet. You need to get to his room now and punch him for me or do something before I get on a plane and murder him myself!” Her voice breaks, and a lone tear slips past her lower eyelid.
There’s a long pause before a loudMOTHER FUCKER!rings through. Then some rustling of fabric and a door slamming shut.I’m guessing he just saw the pictures...a minute or two goes by before sounds start up again. A thunderousBANG! BANG! BANG!can be heard as Clay pounds on a door.
“OPEN THE FUCKING DOOR, HAYES! BEFORE I KICK IT DOWN!” he shouts, banging his fist against the door again.
Suddenly we hear a faint voice saying they’re coming, the swishing sound of the door opening. “What is—”
A distinctive blow sounds through the speaker, cutting off my husband’s words, followed by the loud thud of a body hitting the ground. Morgan gasps loudly with her hand over her mouth, eyes wide with horror.
“WHAT THE FUCK, BURKLEY!? You just punched me in the face!”
“You fucking deserved it, you piece of shit! You’re lucky I don’t do worse! How could you fucking do that to her!?” Clay spits out, deadly anger radiating from his tone.
“What the hell are you talking about, Clay!?” Silas says loudly, irritation and confusion can be heard in his voice.
