Page 115 of Eternally Yours
“Hi.”
It’s so faint, barely audible, but my brain hears it and short-circuits at the sound of my beautiful wife’s voice. My hands give out and release the two coffee mugs.
One thankfully was still mostly over the counter, so it lands upright with a littleover spill. The other isn’t as lucky and crashes to the floor, exploding into millions of pieces with hot coffee splattering everywhere.
I stare at Cecilia with huge eyes, blinking a couple of times, not fully registering the mess I’ve just made.She talked... she talked! TO ME!
I want to run up to her and kiss her, but I know that’s not the right thing to do.Baby steps.So instead, I just stand here like a complete idiot frozen in place.
She takes a tentative step my way and stops again. “Silas?”Oh God, I’m about to lose it. She said my name. I’ve missed hearing my name on her lips.
She takes another step, and I look down at her little bare feet about to touch coffee and finally snap out of it. I throw my hands out in front of me, palms facing her.
“No! Wait. Don’t come closer. Let me clean this up before you step on something.” I hurry off to grab the broom and a cloth to pick up the mess.
Once I’m done, she goes to the stool where her plate is and sits. I hurry to make a new coffee and set it down in front of her. She slips her hands around the mug and looks up into my eyes, stealing my breath away.
Life—it’s what I see when I look in her bright hazels.Life… finally.
“Hi,” I finally say back, voice thick with emotions. I clear my throat and try again. “Hey.”Yeah, not much better.
I sit down beside her and place a crepe on her plate, then push the spread, bananas, and maple syrup her way. I wait for her to finish making her plate before collecting them back and applying them to my dish next.
Shit, I’m nervous.My hands are clammy and shaking as I tighten my hold around the butter knife I’m holding, forcing it to calm down as I glare at it.
A chuckle sounds from beside me, and I turn to look at Cecilia, who has her hand up to her lips, trying to hide her amusement.
“Glad you’re enjoying my messy state,” I say with a chuckle of my own.
She smiles again, then looks down at her food like she’s trying to hide. We attack our breakfast, and the whole time my heart sings. She’s talking. She’s smiling. She’s laughing. She even got dressed and ate more than half her plate.
I’m amazed at the change that’s happened in one day. I want to shout it from the rooftop. But I’m afraid if I point it out too much, she’ll return to her closed-off-state and I don’t want that. I missed my Minnie so much that it was eating me alive.
“Thank you for breakfast, it was delicious.” Her voice is tiny as if she’s still unsure of herself.
“You don’t have to thank me, Minnie. You know I love cooking for you.”
I move my hand toward the one resting on her thigh but stop and place it on the countertop. I hate how one small movement completely dims my mood. I take adeep breath and look down at my empty plate.
Suddenly a slim hand settles on mine. Slowly, I turn to the hand, then look up to my wife. She looks pained. “Silas...” she says quietly. “I’m not trying to punish you. I just need some time... okay? Can you give me that?”
I look back down. “I deserve to be punished,” I whisper. Because it’s the truth, a truth I’ve hated admitting to myself. But I don’t deserve her forgiveness.
“As much as this hurts, I know you never meant for it to happen... everyone makes mistakes.” She squeezes my hand a little.
Why is she doing this? Why is she being so nice? I don’t deserve this. She should hate me. She should be yelling at me. Not forgiving me.
It’s not that I don’t want her forgiveness. I’m just afraid if she does move on from this too fast, she’ll come to regret it and hurt even more in the end. I need her to be sure of this, that she still wants this life with me.
“Not mistakes like this, Cecilia... it should never have happened. I should have stayed in my room like I wanted to and called you like I promised. I should have—” She cuts off my spiraling with the tip of her finger to my lips.
“Shh. Let’s forget that for now. I know we’ll need to talk about it at some point, but I’m not ready. I just want us to enjoy today... can we do that?”
“Yeah, anything you want. Just say it and I’ll make it happen,” I say a bit too eagerly.
She bites her lip like she used to always do when we first started dating. It’s her tell when she’s nervous. “What if we... did something together. Like get out of the house, maybe? Just nothing...”
“Nothing public. Yeah, I get it. It’s better to keep out of the public eye for now.”
