Page 21 of The Significance of Moving On

It’s time. Kelsey walks over to hug me first. “Wish we’d met under better circumstances, but I can never thank you enough for what you’ve done for her.” She wraps her arms around me, squeezing tightly. “You’re my friend now,” she whispers. “So answer my emails. And texts. And phone calls.”

I nod. Goodbyes aren’t my thing.

“There’ll be a lot of ’em.” Yeah, I don’t doubt that.

Next, she moves to Tally. “Girl, I don’t know how to handle this year without you.” They both start bawling all over each other, hugging and petting one another’s backs.

“If there was any way…”

“I know, babe. I know. I’m sorry about Tom, but I’m really angry at him for taking you away from me.”

“Just by miles. Don’t forget about me, okay?”

“I could never forget you, Tal. We’re blood sisters, remember?” The tears don’t stop because she lets go of Tally.

Finally, she moves to my brother. They kiss and I turn away for that moment to give them privacy. For that, and because the one girl I want to kiss, I can’t. I don’t want to be jealous, Demetrius deserves to be happy and Kelsey makes him happy. But damn, there’s only so much a man can take.

“I love you,” she says against his shirt collar, crying harder to the point that it’s almost inaudible. He wraps her in his arms with pained eyes as well.

“Hey, rebel girl,” He’d taken to calling her that since he found out her daddy wouldn’t approve. “I love you, too. Face Time’s our friend, remember. Skype. There’s plenty out there, you’ll get sick of my face real fast.”

She nods and kisses him again. Then she pulls away with her carry on in hand and walks toward security turning to wave one last time before going through the metal detector.

“Don’t forget I’ll be there for homecoming,” D calls after her as she disappears from view.

“You alright, Bro?” I ask.

“Fuck, I just gotta get outta here.” Poor guy presses his eyes with the palm of his hands and starts a fast-paced walk toward the exit. Tally and I follow, not touching, not talking.

D climbs in the front seat of my truck, and Tally takes the back staring out the window. He tries to engage her in conversation, but all Tal manages is short little one and two-word answers until he asks her what her plans are now that summer’s over.

“I don’t really know anymore,” she says. “Maybe I’ll backpack across the United States. There isn’t anything really holding me here, you know.”

My brother whips his head, looking at me. I can feel his stare as I keep mine fixed straight ahead on the road, gripping the steering wheel extra tight.

Why does she have to say things like that? I know I’ve hurt her feelings, but damn. If I actually thought, I mean, what would I do if she left? D’s tried to get me to talk about it, this rift between us, but this is just something I feel should stay between me and Tal. Although he suspects that I’m into her, I’ve never confirmed or denied anything. What would talking about it do anyway? It won’t change the outcome. The good guy gets the girl and I’m not a good guy. Once a bad guy, always the bad guy.

I can tell he wants to ask me about what’s going on between me and Tal, it’s written all over his face. But I’m not a sharer, he should know that by now. Besides, after that verbal gutting I just received from the backseat, how could he think I’d have it in me to talk? I turn up the radio on an awful pop song to drown out any chance at conversation.

The drive only takes us twenty minutes to get back home instead of the usual thirty because everybody is up north for the holiday weekend. Tal practically jumps out of the backseat, slamming the door hard. She doesn’t even look back at me or D. I want to tell her she’s only hurting herself acting this way, but we both know that’s not true. She’s killing me in the slowest, most brutal way she could’ve fashioned.

“Can I hang for a while?” Demetrius asks. “I’m not really feeling the home thing right now. Still smells like Kels.”

“Stay as long as you need, bro. But I’ve got to jet. Work.”

He nods. I’d stay if I could afford to stay since I’m covering for two people to live now.Shit,that’s a dick thing to say.

“Make sure Tally eats something, okay?”

D laughs and shakes his head at me, “Yeah, no problem.”

Labor Day weekend already and this summer hasn’t gone a thing like I thought it would three months ago, before I saw her puddled on the grass across the street. Now—dammit—what if shedoesactually decide to leave? My stomach churns, twisting and twisting knots to the point I have to pull over to collect myself, hitting the steering wheel three times with the heel of my palm.

This level of anxiety hasn’t existed in my little world for years now. All I want to do is call Luke and ask him what I should do, but of course if I could just pick up a phone to call Luke I probably wouldn’t be in this damn situation.

Breathe. Think. If I can breathe and think clearly, maybe there’s a way to figure this mess out. My boss has a sweet spot for those girlie coffee drinks, mocha-frapu-whatnots. We tease him all the time about it. But still I find myself rolling down the window at the Starbucks drive thru ordering three of them, one for him, my work-partner Jesse and me, in hopes that the ice and sugar will loosen those stomach knots some.

Chris and Nick, two more of my coworkers, lean against the trailer attached to one of the company trucks when I pull into the parking lot.

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