Page 231 of Ignite

Even if it was just the hate fuck she’d always wanted, I’m just glad it was with me. That even for one night, she chose me—in the most fucked up way possible.

She slowly turns to face me, her bloodshot eyes swimming in pain.

“Conan, I—” She pauses, taking a shaky breath.

Every muscle in my body tenses.

“We can’t do this again.”

“This?”

She gestures between us.

“We can’t sleep together. It’s best if we just leave each other alone. Okay?” She stumbles over her words.

“That isn’t what I asked you to say.” My voice comes out flat.

“It doesn’t even sound like you’re convinced by your own words. If you want me to stop, say it with your chest.”

I throw the covers off and stand—completely fucking naked—and stride toward her.

Her eyes flick down to my cock.

I tut.

“My eyes are up here, Hallie.”

She scowls, dragging her gaze back to my face.

God, she’s so beautiful when she’s worked up.

“I’m here. I’m ready. Say it,” I press her.

It takes everything not to grab her face and kiss her senseless. To somehow make her feel what I feel. To see how fucking sorry I am.

“Say what? Why are you trying to hurt yourself?” she whispers.

I grin.

“I told you once I like pain. Remember? If you want me out of your life for good, you know what to do.”

Maybe this is the closure I need. The final fuck off.

I can’t move on.

I’ll always be stuck in the life-after-Hallie phase.

Because, like my mom said, there’s one person on this earth for everyone.

Hallie is my person.

I’ve lost her.

So I’m destined to spend the rest of my life miserable and alone.

I deserve it.

Maybe this is a fight I can’t win.