Page 10 of Forgive Me Father: For I Have Sinned

“Let me get to the point. Jamie, I’d like to pay you to take care of these needs while I’m in town. Like I said, I’m here every other week. Wednesday through Friday and would like have you meet me at my hotel room for servicing.”

“Servicing?” I said louder than I’d intended, but seriously, he couldn’t have found a better word? He who sits here in his crisp suit and tie, staring down his nose at me and offering to pay me to, to do what exactly? “What is it exactly you want serviced?” I said, crossing my arms across my chest knowing there was no way in hell I came off in any sort of a threatening manner. For the first time in my life, I wished I was some big, scary guy and not the prissy little twink that I was. Would I forever be reduced to nothing more than a plaything? Used to sate other’s needs?

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to offend you. I just assumed in your line of work.”

I cut him off at that point.

“My line of work? Like as in I’m a whore for money? Is that what you assumed?” Why I was getting so worked up over this, I’ll never know, especially when I’d assumed, he was going to proposition me for sex, but it still struck a nerve just the same.

“Sssh,” he said, scanning the room, “keep your voice down. I didn’t realize you’d be so touchy, but seriously, isn’t sucking dick for money basically the same thing?”

I hated to admit it, so I refused to say it aloud, but he was correct. My body. My choice and I chose to let him continue. “Go on,” I urged him.

He swiped a hand through his hair, and as I tracked its movements, I took the time to evaluate the man in front of me. Unappealing he wasn’t, in a basic sort of way. Casual business attire, black-rimmed glasses, brown eyes, short, curly brown hair. Wedding ring…fuck…. not sure if I had a certain“taste”in mind for what I found attractive, but for a potential first client, he wasn’t repulsive by any means. The whole married thing left me with a feeling of unease.

“Like I said, I’m in town every other week. I’d like to spend time with you outside of your place of employment.”

“Define spending time,” I prodded. Wanting, no needing this transaction to be crystal clear.

“Okay if you need me to say it, I’d like to pay you in cash for us to fuck.”

“Well, that’s pretty clear. I’m not into any of that kinky shit that’s out there,” I didn’t want to get behind closed doors and end up tied to some shitty hotel bed naked or the maids to find the next morning.

“That’s not a problem. Will you consider my offer?”

“I will. Come to the club when you’re back in town. I’m hoping to have a phone by then, so I’ll find a way to get my number to you when I do,” I told him, and he actually smiled.I can do this, I told myself.My own rules.

“Sounds fair,” he said as I stood. “I look forward to seeing you in two weeks, Jamie.” I nodded and left, leaving us both to our thoughts.

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