Page 39 of Reaper Flame

“Nothing worth fighting for is ever easy, especially in a world like ours,” Q said gently. “When a chance at happiness comes along, you need to snatch it before it disappears or it’ll get stolen from you.”

“Rocky told me he loved me last night,” I said, the words spilling out uncontrollably. “I know Zander kept him in the dark, but how can he still stand with him? How are you meant to get over someone screwing you over and making you relive the worst nightmare of your life? Why are they all so blinded by him? Love isn’t always enough.”

“What did you say when Red told you he loved you?” Q asked

“I didn’t know what to say, so I said nothing.”

“And do you love him?”

Hiram once made me read a manual on how to chop up a body, but no one ever taught me how healthy relationships should work. It wasn’t as simple as fiction made you believe. Real love was messy, like an explosion of paint over a canvas. No one prepares you for how painful it is or how it can tear your soul apart.

“I’m not… good… at this,” I said, avoiding answering his question. “Can you love someone and hate them at the same time?”

“I can’t tell you what to feel, but I can tell you Red isn’t the only man on this ship who cares about you,” Q said. “The Sevens were not the same without you gone. They put on a face for the world, but I saw through it.”

“Then why doesn’t Zander suck it up and apologize?” I blasted, then went on to answer my own question. “Because it’d mean him having to admit he felt something, which he doesn’t because he isn’t even human.”

“I can’t tell you what Zander’s thinking, but I do know what it’s like to be hurting when you lose someone,” Q said. “Would you accept an apology?”

Hell fucking no!

“Exactly!” Q declared triumphantly, reading my thoughts. Maybe he had a sixth sense after all. “But if revenge was the only thing you cared about, then you’d have killed them all as soon as they got on board.”

“They outnumbered me.”

“Both of us know being outnumbered has never stopped you before,” he said. “Even if you don’t want to admit it to yourself, you still care.”

“You don’tknowthat.”

“Call it a hunch,” Q said. “The way I see it, you have two choices. You can either hide away down here forever or face them again.”

Q got up to leave.The only thing worse than being near Zander was letting him think I’d been beaten. No one could keep me down. Not Hiram, not the Sevens… no one.

“One more thing,” Q said over his shoulder. “Vixen brought you a suitcase of clothes. I’ll leave it outside if you decide to join us.”

Trust Vixen to care about appearances after our world has been torn apart.

“Q?” I called after him. My mind was already made up. “Don’t start without me.”

* * *

I climbed the stairs to the deck, mentally preparing with every step. As much as I hated to admit it, Q had a point. Our conversation didn’t change my opinion on Zander’s actions. They were still the douchiest move of the century, but I had to know more. I needed to understand how Zander’s twisted mind worked and how he planned everything down to the last detail.

I held my head high as I entered. The Sevens, Mieko and Q were already sitting around a large table that hadn’t been there earlier. Candles were lit and twinkling fairy lights had been strung up around the railings. If it wasn’t for my instinct to stab most of my fellow diners with their own forks, the scene would make a perfect romantic backdrop.

When he saw me, Rocky’s mouth fell open wide enough for a cruise ship to sail through. To his right, Vixen rolled her eyes and said, “Put your tongue back in your head, Red.”

“Wow,” Rocky murmured, keeping his eyes on me. “You look… incredible.”

Hell yeah, I did. Out of the endless skimpy outfits Vixen crammed into the suitcase, I selected a blush pink mesh dress with a hint of sparkle. The top half consisted of a boned corset with built-in balconette cups that pushed my boobs up perfectly. It also spared me from wearing a peek-a-boo bra which provided as much support as a shoelace. Apparently, Vixen favored style over function when it came to lingerie.

West turned his head to follow Rocky’s gaze. He almost choked on his beer, then hastily downed his drink to disguise it. Zander didn’t even bother moving, keeping his back turned away.

I moved to take the final vacant seat between Mieko and Q, making the fabric shimmer with each swish of my hips. Despite hugging my curves like plastic wrap, the dress had enough stretch to stop me from waddling around like I was trying to prevent anal prolapse. Why did designers make tight clothes without movement in mind?

“I knew that dress would look good on you,” Vixen admired smugly. “What did I say, Mieko?”

“You nailed it,” Mieko agreed, leaning over to kiss her fondly on the cheek. “As always.”