Page 46 of Thanatos' Craving

“And where are you going to go Juniper?” His boned face, still hidden in the hood, rested on my shoulder. “Do you have afamily? I’ll still let you see them if you wish. It's just that your new home will be here—with me.”

My heart picked up and my palms sweated.

Not at the thought of staying here, but at the sick thought of someone wanting me to stay. To have a home. Someone wanted me to stay in their home? No one has ever wanted me for that.

He wouldn’t want me to stay. After a while he would find me annoying, get bored —

Thanatos hummed. “You are thinking, but you aren’t speaking. Don’t hide things from me. I like it when you speak your mind.”

“Y-you do?”

Because no one ever did before. They thought me different, weird. The odd one out.

Thanatos’ warm hand comes to cup my cheek to turn my face to look into his hood. The sleeve to his robe falls away from his hand, revealing his wrist and his forearm. Only his hand had skin. Below his wrist was nothing but bone.

My stomach churned, and I felt the blood drain from my face.

I think I’m going to be sick.

“What?” The deep, dark, seductive voice left Thanatos and was now replaced with a voice of concern.

I slapped my hand to my face again, and I pushed my hand to his chest. He let me go this time, and I stumbled away from him and raced to the bathroom. The lights rose brightly so I could see where I was going. I pushed away the curtain that led to the bathroom.

He had a hand, but then there was just bone. How does the blood stay in there?

I fell to my knees in front of the ebony-colored toilet and threw my guts up. Soon after, I felt the warm presence of a body behind me. Thanatos’ hands pulled my hair back, and again I retchedbecause he could very well have two hands and then nothing but bone beyond that.

Oh my gods, he has skin gloves on!

“My body is no longer bone, Juniper, you have nothing to fear.” He held my hair gently and placed a cold washcloth on the back of my neck with care. “Yet I wonder why this sets you off and not just my boned body?” He chuckled again.

Is he seriously chuckling right now? I never thought I would hear it, but here he was, the God of Death, chuckling.

I flushed the toilet to get rid of the food from the night before, but I kept my face buried inside. My face, covered in sweat, surely looked pale and disgusting.

“I don’t know. I kept thinking you were wearing someone’s skin for gloves. I might have had flashbacks of my blood over my body. I haven’t come to terms with my own near-death experience yet either.” I sighed and leaned my head on my forearm across the toilet.

Thanatos growled, his knee coming down on the floor, and continued to wipe my forehead with a cloth. When I opened my eyes, I saw it wasn’t his hand wiping my forehead, neck, and face, but the shadows.

His shadows were an extension of him. The tendril backed away, like a tentacle, maybe a snake, and wrung out the water and soaked it with fresh, new cool water from the sink. I watched in amazement as it came from the sink and gently pressed it against my forehead. The coolness instantly soothed the pounding ache in my head.

“Thank you,” I whispered, my voice barely audible.

Thanatos remained silent, his presence a comforting weight behind me. Despite my initial shock and confusion, I can’t deny that there was something undeniably comforting about his presence.

He knows loneliness, and I know it too.

As the shadow continued to comfort me, I gathered my thoughts and tried to compose myself. Thanatos watched me intently, his eyes searching for any signs of distress or discomfort. His presence is both intimidating and oddly comforting at the same time.

“I’m sorry,” I mumbled, still feeling queasy. “I didn’t mean to react that way. This god stuff, how you can materialize skin—” I swallowed.

His voice filled with understanding as he spoke, “Juniper, you don’t need to apologize. Your reaction is valid. We all have our past traumas, our fears. It’s only natural for them to resurface in moments like these. I didn’t mean to upset you. I forget sometimes that not everyone is accustomed to my antics.” He stared off into the corner of the bathroom.

I took a deep breath, trying to steady myself. “It’s not just that,” I admitted, my voice barely above a whisper. “It’s everything. This whole situation is overwhelming. And then you tell me I can never leave?”

With the comfort I drew from him, my hand balled into a fist. Anger now roiled within me. He couldn’t possibly make me stay here. I was human. There had to be a law of some kind forbidding a mortal to stay in the Underworld—alive.

Thanatos’ eyes brightened, and he stood. His shadows still tended to me, wiping away the sweat. “I won’t lie to you, Juniper. You can never leave this place without me. You have become too valuable to me, and soon you will realize that you cannot live without me either.”

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