Page 110 of Crave Thy Neighbor

She thinks I sound like an idiot too.

“Do you mind?” I point to the booth.

She waves her hand. “Go right ahead.”

I slip into the spot across from her, noticing the way she backs up to avoid our knees brushing together. It reminds me of all the time we’ve spent sitting like this, finding any excuse to touch each other under the table where nobody could see us.

“I’m sorry I missed the party.”

She chokes out a laugh, though there’s not even a hint of humor in it. “Tell that to my son who was excited to show you the progress he made on his video game.”

“I did.”

She crosses her arms over her chest. “You know, Nolan, I can live with you ignoring me, but I can’t deal with you hurting my kid. Sam loves you. He doesn’t deserve that.”

“You’re right. He doesn’t. I’m an asshole.”

“A giant asshole.”

“I’m a giant asshole.”

The corners of her lips twitch, but she puts a stop to it fast, turning her gaze out the window.

We sit in silence, me tapping my fingers against the table in a nervous manner, her staring outside, pretending I’m not sitting across from her.

“So, uh,” I start when I can’t take it any longer, “how’d the move go?”

Like an ass, I volunteered to work the weekend she moved into her new place. I couldn’t be there when she left. Couldn’t watch her walk away.

“Fine.”

“Do you like your new place?”

“It’s fine.”

“How are you?”

She drags her gray eyes back to me, and there’s no mistaking the pain rippling in them, or the tiredness. Her eyes are puffy and dark, like she’s not been sleeping well. I wonder if it’s because of me.

“Fine, Nolan. I’m fine.”

She’s anything but fine, and we both know it.

She’s hurting like I’m hurting.

I lean across the table and she matches my movement, though I’m not sure she even notices she does it.

I run my tongue over my lips, trying to find the words to say to her as she stares at me with a mix of curiosity and trepidation.

“Maya, I—”

“Hey, Mom,” Sam says, interrupting us. Maya sits back, putting distance between us once again. “Can we get ice cream next?”

“Sure can, kiddo. Whatever you want.”

I tilt my head, surprised.

She shrugs. “We do it every year around his birthday. I pull him out of school for a day and we have fun.”

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