Page 37 of A Taste of Grace

Esther and Hannah stepped away from the bikes.

I nodded then opened the door, holding my suit coat and work bag in my hands, pleased that my girls retained some of the lessons I taught them.

“Tell me more about your lady friend before she gets here.” Mama stirred the big pot of mustard greens on the stove, halfway turning to me as I set the six cornish hens I grilled on the wooden cutting board on the counter.

“Her name is Dr. Grace Toliver. She’s the reason your granddaughters looked presentable around the head today. I tied those silk scarves over their plaits like she told me. All I had to do was throw a couple of bows in their hair, and they looked like princesses.”

Mama flashed all her teeth at me and tapped my arm.

“Hmm…I’ve been giving you the same hair tips for years. It takes this Dr. Grace lady for you to listen. She must be quiteattractive and persuasive. My baby has never given the time of day to an ugly woman.”

Mama wasn’t lying.

“She’s nice looking.”

“What kind of doctor is she?”

“Ed psych. She worked for the government before moving here.”

“Smart with practical skills to help my grandbabies be the best they can be? And someone you actually listen to? Shemustbe sent by God. Why didn’t I meet her at church? Does she love the Lord?”

“Hold on, Mama. You’re doing too much. She’s a behind-the-scenes woman who prefers to keep to herself. You can ask her all the questions you want at dinner, but please have some tact.”

“When have I not had tact?” she huffed.

I rolled my eyes.

“I’m not answering that question.”

“Fine. Can she cook?”

“I think so. She’s bringing homemade banana pudding. Your favorite.”

“It’s your favorite too, so she earns even more brownie points. She sounds perfect, like an answer to a lot of prayers. Those girls need a God-fearing woman around them, not like that whore Roxanne.” Mama stopped stirring the greens and set her spoon down.

“You know…about Roxanne?” I lowered my eyes and squirmed like one of my kids when they were about to get in trouble.

“Baby, who didn’t? Y’all couldn’t sneak around worth shit. You know how hard I had to fight to get you appointed as pastor of your daddy’s church after all that? To be fair, you got them undercover hoe genes from yo’ pappy. That, plus, I can spot a shiftless tramp a mile away. I eventually forgave Bishop, but hewas still a hoe until the day he died. I hope the lady that’s coming over can keep the Roxannes at bay.” Mama pointed her spoon my way. “Because if you don’t get married soon, you’re going to have a reputation ten times worse than your daddy. I know about them nasty panties and donations too.” She wiped her hands on the towel nearest her and planted her eyes on me.

“Mama! Who’s telling all my business?” I shouted, embarrassed and completely shocked at her language.

I looked around to make sure the girls were still playing in their room.

Mama put her hands on her hips.

“Don’t worry about that. And don’tMamame. Yo thick-headed, limp dick daddy made me a cussin’ Christian, putting that Vienna sausage of a penis in any wet hole he could find. That’s why I made him wrap it up when he came poking around me. I need you to do right. It’s up to you to redeem the family line as senior pastor. I won’t leave this earth with the only son I got left being called Sir DickALot or the Holy Hoe.” She turned around in circles as if she were having a mini fit.

This conversation was nasty and embarrassing. I was ready to run away and hide. My mother had always been the epitome of decorum in public, yet here she was, spilling all my scalding hot tea and not giving a damn about it. Jesus had to be coming back soon. None of this made sense.

“Back to this Grace woman. What makes her so special?” Mama asked the question as if she hadn’t just scarred me for the rest of the year.

I sighed and set the carving knife on the counter. I crossed my arms and closed my eyes briefly, silently seeking permission from God to share what I knew in my heart about Grace. I spoke low and with precision, preparing my ears for the words that were about to come from my mouth.

“As hoeish as Iusedto be…” I paused for emphasis. “I want to settle down. Grace is the one I want to court. If she’ll have me,” I added quickly. “I plan to be faithful to her and move with her as a husband should. I am attracted to her in every way a man should be attracted to a woman. She moves my spirit and my body.”

Mama gasped and reached for my chin. She held my face firm and smooshed my cheeks with her fingers.

“Tell me you’re not lying.”

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