Page 29 of This Violent Light
Nothing does.
“This is pointless,” I tell her. I slump back against the couch. The movement reminds me I’m wearing a stranger’s clothes. All black, hideous, and one size too small. The shirt pinches at my armpits, and the skirt is barely covering my butt.
I add wardrobe options to my list of complaints for Sebastian. His right-hand man, a gray-haired vampire named Oskar, has been delivering me to and from my Cora sessions. I haven’t seen Sebastian since the night he gave meLegally Blondeand tomato soup.
Apparently, he’s tired of me, and I can’t exactly blame him.
No. Screw that. I can one hundred percent blame him. It’s his fault I’m here, and it’s his stupid witch’s fault I’m not making progress. She’s asking me to defy gravity and logic, and she won’t even tell me the secret to do it.
“I agree,” Cora says. She sits on her coffee table, taking a deep chug of tea. She’s almost always drinking it, and though the flavor occasionally changes, it almost always stinks. She hums to herself as she lowers the mug, then sighs. “I suppose we should get your menstrual cycle taken care of. You’re nearing it, aren’t you?”
“God,” I say, dropping my head against the back of the couch. “If you could just smite me from the heavens, that would be great.”
“What, you’re embarrassed of your period?” Cora asks. She arches an eyebrow. “You’ve spent over a week with a horde of vampires, and the thing making you beg for death isyour period?”
“No,” I say. “It’s the fact you and Sebastian and every single person I’ve encountered here treats me like a problem to be solved. If it’s not my inability to cast, it’s the fact I bleed. If it’s not the fact I bleed, it’s the fact I’m not eating well. If it’s not?—”
“Yeah, yeah, forget I asked,” Cora says. She flaps her wrist at me as she rises, taking both her mug and my two bowls with her. “I get it. You’re feeling sorry for yourself.”
“Of course I am,” I shriek. “I was abducted! I’m being held against my will. Crazy people are threatening to drain my blood.”
“I think we’ll call it a day,” Cora says. She rings an old-fashioned bell beside her door. It’s not very loud, but my babysitter always shows up within a matter of minutes.
Fine by me. I’m ready to go back to my room, eat whatever version of tomato soup the servants make, and sleep for twelve hours straight.
I shove off the couch, straightening my skirt as well as I can, and stand at the door. While I wait, Cora flits in the background. She washes the dishes by hand, even though she obviously could do it with her fancy mind magic. If I could move things without touching them, dishes would be the first chore to go.
A slow knock comes at the door, and I straighten my posture without consciously deciding to. It’s Sebastian. Oskar knocks like an FBI agent about to kick down the door. Beatrice knocks like an impatient twelve-year-old. Sebastian’s knock is heavy and slow, like he has nowhere to be but you best answer quickly anyway.
Cora opens the door and I stand between her and Sebastian like a child of divorce. His eyes flick briefly to mine before settling on my teacher.
“Well?” he asks.
“Nothing,” Cora says, and she says it as if it should be obvious. As if he shouldn’t expect anything else, no matter how many more days they let me try.
She’s not wrong.
“That’s unacceptable,” Sebastian says. His eyes are on me again, but his expression is impossible to read.
“I’m trying,” I say. I hate how scared and pathetic I sound. It’s inescapable at this point. I’m not naive enough to believe they’ll keep me around forever. At some point, they’re going to tire of this, and once they do, I’m done.
They’ll kill me to try to break their curse, or maybe just out of pure spite.
“You’ve done it before,” Sebastian says. His voice is low,addicting. For a moment, I am transported back to the bar, when I thought he was just a random guy hitting on me.
I don’t argue with Sebastian. I know I used magic that night he attacked me. I saw it on his chest, felt his blood on my hands.
“That was different,” I say. I’m glaring at him now, hands tight at my sides. “I panicked. I didn’t even mean to do it. I swear, I’m trying everything. Cora isn’t exactly the best teacher.”
I expect Cora to argue, but when she doesn’t, I only feel more stupid. We all know she isn’t the one having issues. I tighten my fists again, and Sebastian tracks the movement. His gaze wanders to my skirt, lingering there for a noticeable moment.
“If you’re done ogling my legs,” I snap, satisfied when his attention snaps back to my face. “I’d like to go to my room.”
“I’m sure you would,” is his growled response. “Unfortunately for you, my patience is waning. You’re not exactly a house pet I’d like to keep.”
“May I recommend you release me then?” I ask sweetly. I can only hope he doesn’t notice the way my knees tremble, the way my heart leaps in my throat. I’m treading dangerous waters, but I won’t be treated like an unwelcome guest when he’s literally holding me hostage.
“Actually, I have a better idea,” he says. His smile is slow, leering, as he looks from me to Cora. His grin is almost demonic. “I’ll be back in one hour. See if you can’t find her some pants.”
