Page 7 of My Soul Is His

“Yeah, the others broke from the pact, and we have rules. Leave no one behind. You remember how fucking scary it is when you first come here?‌ The fear never leaves, but you adjust.” I fiddle with the drawstrings on my hoodie.

“I’m sorry, I never meant to be a burden,” Chloe whispers. Her fidgeting and the despair in her eyes show the turmoil of her ruminating thoughts.

“Chloe, this is Sid. He was the first person I met here. You can remain here as long as you want. We might have to move eventually, but for now, you’re right at home.” I squeeze her arm, and she gives a meek smile.

“Marla is pretty tough,” Sid says. “Crazy, but good shit. You aren’t a burden, and I know I’m just some dude who’s bleeding on the floor, butyoumake a difference, no matter how bad your thoughts and memories harm you.”

They chat, and I use the time to search for Sebastian. The tunnel curves in the middle where culverts run through with icy water. It gives us a private area at the back for when we take in others.

I find him near the rear entrance, fiddling with branches and rocks. “Weapons won’t work, my love,” I tell him.

“I’ll never stop trying, though. How’s it going over there?” He jerks his head toward the light laughter coming from the front.

“Sid can help her more than I am. He’s been doing this solo for a long time.”

“You do so good, Marla. I’m proud of you.” I sit on his knee and nuzzle against his chest.

The haunting sound of Jess’s voice calls out to me. Her voice curls through the darkness, a ghostly murmur riding the wind. My jaw locks tight, teeth grinding as I roll onto my side, pressing my palms hard against my ears. But it doesn’t matter—nothing drowns her out.

"Marla..." A whisper, soft as a breath against my neck. "I need you."

The words slither under my skin, cold and relentless. I squeeze my eyes shut.

She’s not here. She can’t be. Right?

I don’t know if it’s real or fake, and after I pull myself into a standing position, Sebastian mumbles in his sleep but rolls over. I creep toward the front of the tunnel where Sid and Chloe are asleep, not knowing if either of them will wake up.

I turn on my heels and head out the rear entrance.

Hazy air sits heavy against my muscles and as my chest tightens, it’s like an elephant is lying on me. Slipping through the long grass and around our home, I find the route I’ve taken many times.

Sebastian’s disapproval is a small price to pay for the happiness of seeing Jess again.

“Marla.”

The sorrowful sound makes my heart ache. I’ll never forgive myself for not fighting for her more, or the goodbye I never got out.

Dark crimson clouds overhead swirl around. There shouldn’t be another drop of souls today, unless Earth has gotten that bad. It’s a wonder we all fit in this realm sometimes.

Fear pulsates through the atmosphere, and as much as I try to make it better for people, I know this will always remain a terrible place.

A large purple figure darts in and out of my peripheral vision, its beady orange eyes and fangs filling me with panic.

Dread courses through me and I pick up the pace, jogging toward the circle on the wall that I’ve found before. Crystal-clear glass greets me to stare through.

Tripping over a hole in the ground, I crash, the right side of my body entangled in a dense thicket of brambles, their scratchy leaves and thorns digging in.

The searing pain of being torn apart fades into blissful relief, a victory over the demons that had threatened me.

Despite its flaws, this coping mechanism has saved me from a complete emotional breakdown, where all that would be left is an empty shell.

As I stare into the other realm, I watch Jess rise from a comfy chair and wrap her arms around a man with dark hair. She’s found someone to cherish, and it’s all I’ve ever wanted, a person to love her in every way she deserves.

Beyond my selfish wants, I’m fiercely protective of her and don’t want her to journey through this dangerous realm.

Jess and I became the best of friends at a point and time when we needed each other the most. I don’t know about her history or what life was like for her before me.

Similar to one of those projector toys from my childhood, the scene switches, and my mother fills the clear glass. Her deceitfulmask was never replaced, and I hate that she is in this serene place with my grandparents and Jess.

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