Page 19 of My Soul Is His

“Back to the two of us. What will we ever do?” I ask and raise an eyebrow. Her giggle fills the space and restores my heart rate to normal.

As she walks toward my chair, the ground shakes, and large black eyes peer through the branches of our roof. I know he’s here again and is angry that I didn’t succumb to the dreadful music earlier.

Marla’s face blurs, a whirlwind of emotions washing over me as my mind races. I was made to protect her, and now I’m the vulnerable one, unable to keep her safe from everything.

Hands of the past reach through our canopy and grasp at my clothes. My father’s words reverberate within me, and I close my eyes, waiting for the next assault.

“Sebastian, stay here with me,” Marla begs.

As much as I want to meet her wishes, I’m taken deeper into my mind and the house of nightmares replaces our treehouse. Old décor covers the walls, and a door slams.

He’s coming for me once more, and this time I’m not even a man. I’m the little boy who couldn’t ever be enough. My body trembles with fear as the heavy tread of his boots pound the old wooden floor, and I rack my brain trying to remember my mistake.

“You no-good piece of shit. I’ve told you time and time again to keep your toys off the front lawn.” My father stands before me, shaking his finger at me, and as he gets closer, it’s jammed into my shoulder.

“I’m sorry, Dad,” I whisper.

His deep chuckle fills my ears, and I swallow the lump in my throat. My vision blurs, the unshed tears burning my eyes like acid rain, but I understand crying won’t change anything. Even at my young age, that one tear will bring terrible consequences.

“You’re gonna be sorry, boy,” he grunts.

Snapping off his belt, I anticipate what’s coming and as his large hand wraps around my tiny shoulder; I brace for the impact. Every day he does this despite my best efforts, and I don’t know why.

“My love,” Marla screams.

The past dissipates, like a storm passing through, and I look into her hazel eyes. She grips my thighs and launches herself into my lap, squashing the darkness.

I grip her neck and bring her closer. Kissing her fiercely, I pull back to gaze into her irises before I press my lips tenderly to hers again. “I love you so fucking much, my dove.”

“I adore you, Sebastian. There is no one I’d rather spend eternity with than you. You’re doing so well. I know it feels impossible, but you are handling things.”

She’s crazy. These days, the past I thought I’d killed and buried returns like a relentless tide of guilt and dread, its crushing weight suffocating me and threatening to destroy my very being. The memories, sharp and vivid, claw at my mind.

“Let’s go, we’ll welcome the new souls, get our minds off things, alright?” She grasps my hand and as we link fingers, I know I chose this to protect her from the torture. I’m unsure if I’ll make it, but I will do my best for her.

As we walk out into the realm, I glance around at the deep crimson sky. Every time new souls are coming, it’s always darker than normal. Usually a red and orange blend becomes shrouded in terror and rage.

“I’m glad they went off on their own. The other areas didn’t occur to me. I don’t know why I feel bad,” I tell her as we walk.

“We can’t know everything, but I agree. I wonder how many people I let down, although maybe it’s for the best. If we were everywhere, we might have never met Sid and Chloe and showed them the way.” Marla has a pep to her I’ve never seen, and I love it.

As we reach the crowd, they are bickering amongst themselves and my dove whistles loudly. Most turn to look at her, and with a deep sigh she does the speech she always does. Cries fill the air, and she hugs people before pairing some of them up who don’t run.

After a while we’re left alone again, and she turns and shrugs before grabbing my hand, and we head back.

Once we reach the trail to our home, I notice the branches of the roof caved in. The angry red bitch of my old demon leers at me before stumbling away.

Long, skeletal shadows stretch across the lawn as I envision the camouflage monster tearing the house apart, its actions echoing in the silence of my mind. We can never have a moment of peace.

“Sebastian, it’s okay. Just some branches. Come on.”

I stare at her, mesmerized for a few minutes before looking away, then notice the house is fine except for the damaged roof. Shaking my head, I walk in with her and kneel once we’ve crossed the front entrance.

The sting of defeat settles in, and I wonder what our future might have held.

Marla drops before me, grasping my face with both hands as she stares into my eyes.

“You’ve got this, my love. We’re going to go to the Lords and switch this. I’ve been able to live my life this way, and I refuse to watch you break in front of me.”

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