Page 47 of Finn's Solace

It'd been four days since the night I had my episode, and I'd made a decision.

If I wanted to do this thing right, if I wanted to be with Levi for the rest of our lives, I had to get better. I'd allowed my past to drag me down again and again, but I couldn't let it keep doing that. Not when it meant dragging Levi down with me.

We'd spent the night together again once, and thankfully, I hadn't had a nightmare then. I did have one the next night, and not being with Levi had made it that much worse, because I'd dreamed of his death again, and not being able to make sure he was okay had been terrifying. I'd ended up calling him, and he'd assured me he was okay over the phone, then sent Greta to cuddle with me. It had helped more than he could imagine, but I'd felt guilty about waking him, especially since he had work the next day.

I'd been debating with myself since, but today, I was done. I knew what I had to do.

Picking up my phone, I scrolled through my contacts until I found the one. I hadn't called this number in a while, but I hit dial before I could talk myself out of it.

The phone rang for a few seconds before a cheerful voice answered, "Dr. Celeste Griffin's office. How may I help you?"

"Ah, hello. This is Finn. Finn Presley. I was hoping to make an appointment with Dr. Griffin if they have an opening anytime soon."

"Let me check. Please stay on the line."

"Sure thing," I said, tapping my fingers on the desk as I waited. It'd been a while since I'd seen Dr. Griffin, but they had helped me out plenty before. It wasn't their fault I hadn't told them everything. They could only help so much when I wasn't letting them in.

"All right. Dr. Griffin had a cancellation tomorrow, if six p.m. works for you?"

Tomorrow was Friday, but Levi and I hadn't really made any plans yet. I could make that work.

"It does, thank you. It's been a while since my last appointment. Is their office still at the cabin?"

"Yes, same place. I've added you to their calendar."

"Thank you."

"Do you need anything else, Mr. Presley?"

"No, thank you. Have a good day."

"You too!"

The call ended, and I placed my phone on the desk, then sighed. I'd always struggled when it came to talking to Dr. Griffin, but my reasons for it had been different back then.

When I was a kid, I'd been worried they would tell the dads anything I shared with them, despite their promise not to. At that point in my life, I'd believed adults weren't dependable. I'd struggled to trust even Dad and Papa, and it had taken me years to feel completely at ease around them, to believe them when they told me they loved me.

Of course, it was then that I discovered what I was, and turned Papa to stone on the night of my eighteenth birthday. That night had somehow been worse than all the time I'd spent in captivity. I'd been terrified that it was what would finally make my dads decide to kick me out, throw me away because I wasn't good enough. After all, my birth parents had done the same, so why shouldn't my dads?

Instead, the first thing Papa had done after turning back was hug me. Then Dad had joined the hug, and they'd both held me until I felt better. That was when I'd finally accepted my dads really loved me and would never abandon me.

I'd seen Dr. Griffin again after that, and we'd talked a little about my basilisk side, and how it felt like a separate person inside me now that it was 'awake.' I hadn't brought up my childhood then, and maybe if I had, things would be different now.

Shaking my head, I woke up my laptop, then spent a minute glaring at the spreadsheet I was supposed to be working onbefore getting to it. Focusing on the data helped me push all other thoughts to the back of my mind, and I spent the next few hours blissfully lost in a world of numbers, rows, columns, formulas, and lots of data to sort and clean up.

At dinner, Dad and Papa asked me how things were going with Levi, and I shared some of the tamer details with them. They—especially Dad—were delighted by my new relationship, and I was glad they both liked Levi. He was pretty damned likeable.

"When you two are ready, we should have a clan get-together so Levi can meet everyone and officially join," Dad suggested, and I bit my tongue as I mulled over it. I knew Levi was excited to meet the clan—some more than others. Was it wrong of me to want to keep him to myself for a while longer?

The clan had a tendency of being a little...much, and I wasn't ready to share Levi with all of them. I'd already had to introduce him to my parents, my siblings, and the others. I didn't want the whole clan hogging up his time, not when I only got the weekends with him myself.

"Maybe in a few weeks," I finally said, and Dad opened his mouth, probably to protest, but Papa placed his hand over Dad's, stopping him.

"Angel, they've only been together for a short time. Let them do this at their pace, okay? Finn will tell us when he's ready for it."

I shot Papa a grateful look, and he gave me a wink, then stood up. "Come on. Help me with the dishes."

Dad gathered the rest of the dishes, including mine, before following Papa to the sink. I watched them go, then stood up, figuring I'd go back to my room and maybe call Levi. He should be home by now.

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