Page 53 of When We Were Young

‘Don’t call me a fucking idiot!’ Aidan shoved Will again but he was braced for it this time. ‘Izzy’s right, youarealways looking at Emily. Did you think you could get away with that? She’s my girlfriend!’

‘Like you give a shit! You didn’t bother to go to her exhibition, you don’t show any interest in her art, or her friends!’

‘Will…’ Emily pleaded.

‘And I suppose you do, do you?’ Aidan stepped closer, squaring up to him.

‘You only asked her out because you saw me looking at her!’

‘Bullshit!’ A fleck of spit flew out of Aidan’s mouth and landed on Will’s cheek.

‘What about the night of Emily’s show? You came to our gig at ULU and you left with that—’

Aidan’s fist connected with Will’s cheekbone with such force it threw him backwards. Everything slid into slow motion on the long journey to the floor. He saw his dad come up behind Aidan and wrap his arms around him. Why was he hugging him?Uncle Brian was there too, shouting silently. And Emily – beautiful Emily – brought her hands to her mouth, her eyes brimming with tears.

Chapter 26

April 2016

Emily

I drag Liv’s keys towards me across the table. ‘My daughter. She’s here.’

‘Here?’ asks FHD, his eyes reflecting my panic.

I run to my handbag in the hall and rummage for my phone, which I’ve kept politely zipped up for our entire date. I haven’t checked it once.

There are three messages and a missed call from Scott.

The latest reads:Please call or text me when you get this. I’m getting worried.

The previous one:She wants to stay over. I hope that’s okay.

And the first one says:Liv needs a book from yours for revision. You should take this opportunity to talk. I’ll drop her over shortly.

I kick off my heels and run back to the kitchen.

‘I’m sorry, but you have to leave,’ I hiss. ‘She’s upstairs.’

He gapes at me before following me obediently out to the hall.

‘I’m sorry,’ I whisper. ‘Can you get an Uber from up the road?’

‘Sure.’

‘Thanks for tonight.’ I practically shove him out the door. ‘Sorry,’ I add, before shutting it on him.

I run upstairs to Liv’s room in the loft. Hopefully, she didn’t hear anything from two floors up. The door to her room is ajar – unusual for her – she likes her privacy. The lights are off. I wait for my eyes to adjust and make out the shape of her body under the duvet. Is she asleep or do I want to believe she is to avoid explaining why a strange man was in the house? She hasn’t slept through me coming into her room for years.

I back out and go downstairs. I text Scott to let him know I’m okay and text FHD to apologise.

After I take off my make-up and peel off my best underwear, I lie in bed alone. I’m glad we didn’t end up doing anything. It would have been a mistake.

I remember the last time I had sex. Scott and I had taken Liv on a ‘family’ holiday. We did that when she was younger. Where was it? Majorca? Liv must have been about ten. We always got separate rooms, me in with Liv, and Scott in an adjoining room or on a sofa bed in the lounge area.

It was a hurried, hushed fumble in the dark with Liv fast asleep in the next room. We didn’t speak about it afterwards, and just as we had the handful of times it had happened before, we pretended it hadn’t. He always obliged, never questioned, and never asked for anything more.

The next day I was embarrassed and guilty and lonelier than ever. I caught him looking at me from the next sun lounger where he and Liv were playing travel chess in the shade. I remember the pity in his eyes. And after that, I insisted we went on separate holidays.