Page 54 of Surprises on the Scottish Isle

‘Yes and no,’ she replied, cryptically. ‘There’re quite a few houses within my price range, but hardly any in Duncoorie.’

‘I didn’t think there would be. And those that come on the market are snapped up pretty sharpish.’ He stared into the unlit fireplace. ‘There’s always Yvaine’s house.’

Tara shuddered. ‘I did think about it, but it would be too weird.’

Cal must have been thinking the same thing because after hearing she wasn’t interested in it, he brightened. ‘Show me what you’ve got?’

Tara took them out of her bag and for the next half hour, whilst eating cheese toasties and soup, they hashed over the various properties until Tara felt she had a better understanding of what was out there and what she wanted. The most important consideration was the distance from Duncoorie. Although Portree was only a thirty-minute drive away and there were many more properties for sale in the town, she wanted to be as near as possible to her studio.

That she would be nearer to Cal wasn’t a factor. Or so she told herself.

‘Did Mhairi give you a time limit on how long you can stay in the boathouse?’ he asked.

‘She didn’t, but I’m guessing she doesn’t want me there indefinitely. I’ve got some leeway to find the right property, but I don’t want to outstay my welcome.’

‘What about this one?’ Cal picked the topmost sheet off the little pile they had created. ‘It’s only a mile out of the village. I’ll grant you it’s a bit old-fashioned, but it’s perfectly habitable.’

It was, and the price was reasonable, too. It was a detached, substantial three-bedroom house, with quite a bit of land. The whitewashed walls and grey slate roof were typical of the area, and there were lawns to the front and back. It needed some updating inside, but she could live with it as it was for the time being.

So what was stopping her from going to view it?

She told herself it would be better to wait until her share of the Edinburgh house was safely in her bank account, and that setting her heart on a property now might lead to disappointment should it fall through. But deep down Tara knew the real reason – she wanted to stay at the boathouse for as long as possible. Knowing that Cal lived just a short walk away anchored something in her soul that she hadn’t realised was adrift.

What if Jinny and Mack were right, and Cal still had feelings for her? Could she trust him not to break her heart again?

Quietly Tara snorted to herself.Again?It hadn’t healed from the last time. It was still broken, and she strongly suspected only Cal could mend it. However, she’d reached a state of equilibrium and if she allowed Cal back in, she was in danger of losing that.

But did she want to spend the rest of her life wondering what might have happened if she’d had the courage to give it another go? And if she didn’t and he began a relationship with someone else, could she live with that?

Feeling courageous and more than a little reckless, she said, ‘Where wouldyoulike me to live? Duncoorie or somewhere further away?’

‘Duncoorie.’ His reply was immediate. Then he looked her in the eye and said, ‘If it was up to me, you could live in the boathouse forever.’

She swallowed. ‘I thought that after everything that had happened between us, you wouldn’t want me here.’

‘Tara…’ His voice was a low rumble. ‘Believe me when I say Idowant you here.’ The intensity of his gaze made her drop her own for fear he might guess she still loved him, despite what he’d done and everything that had happened throughout the intervening years.

For so long she’d told herself she hated him, but it couldn’t be further from the truth.

Suddenly she felt incredibly sorry for Dougie. He hadn’t stood a chance, had he? No wonder he’d sought solace elsewhere. She hadn’t been able to give him her heart because it had already belonged to someone else.

Neither she nor Cal spoke on the way back.

When they reached the castle, Tara expected him to drop her off at the top of the track leading to the boathouse, but instead he drove down it and pulled up outside.

‘I meant it,’ he said, as she reached for the handle. ‘I do want you to stay. Very much. But there’s something I’ve been wanting to tell you. Something I should have told you years ago. And if I’d told you back then, we mightn’t have split up.’

‘What?’ She searched his face for a clue, but he wasn’t giving anything away. He looked serious though, and her heart gave an uncomfortable lurch. Whatever it was, she had a feeling she wouldn’t like it.

‘I lied to you. I didn’t split up with you because we were too young, or because you lived in Glasgow and I lived in Inverness, or any of the other reasons I gave. I ended it because my dad had a breakdown and my parents made me promise not to tell anyone. I might have broken my promise and told you, but they needed me there and I didn’t know how long it would be until he was better. I didn’t know if he everwouldget better, that he’d ever be well enough for my mum not to worry that he’d do something unspeakable if he was left on his own.’ Cal’s eyes filled with tears.

Tara wanted to reach across and brush them away, but she sensed he needed to get it off his chest first.

‘We thought he might have to be sectioned at one point, but he begged and begged, and Mum—’ He swallowed and took a deep breath. ‘It took him a while to improve, baby steps, but he got there in the end. But it was too late for me and you.’

‘Oh, Cal…’ Tara’s heart was breaking all over again. ‘I would have waited for you, if I’d known.’

‘It could have been a very long time. A very long time indeed. I didn’t want to do that to you.’

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