Page 56 of The Prodigal

“Probably none of your business,” I say between bites of mediocre pancakes, eyeing the beer I ordered with breakfast on Eden’s side of the table.

She isn’t getting any answers until she acts like she has some sense. No one takes my beer because “I’m driving” and “underage.” I’m in no mood for her smiles and morals.

“Does he work with your dad and uncles?”

I flash her an annoyed look that she ignores for the fiftieth time since we sat down. “You caught me.” I grab her plate and pull it over to my side of the table, stabbing my fork through three layers of pancake. “I’m getting butt implants. Dr. Depressing thinks it’s time my ass matches the size of my personality.”

She lets out a boisterous laugh, snatching the fork from my hand, and takes a bite for herself, like we share food on the regular. “Maybe you should look into a penis enlargement. Then both your heads would be big.”

My dick jumps in my pants. “Now, now, Eve. Don’t make me do something stupid like stand up and let you measure it with your mouth.”

I fight a smile as her cheeks flush pink, and then wait for her to scold me for being crass. She doesn’t. Instead, she uses my favorite tactic and changes the subject. “You know, Remington, sometimes friends share things over breakfast. Things like an explanation as to why Dr. Depressing isstillblowing up your phone.”

She points to my phone on the table. I turned off the notifications earlier, but it still lights up every time Dr. Doesn’t Get the Hint texts me his angry messages.

“Well, I would, cupcake,” I tease, like the asshole I am, “but we’re not friends.”

I don’t know what her definition of a friend is, but keeping myself from grinding my cock into her ass for hours is certainly not mine.

She’s not my damn friend.

She’s my annoying enemy.

My innocent and supple pawn.

“We are friendsandpartners, 101. Just admit you like me.”

She’s so easy to fuck with. “What makes you think I like you?”

She shakes her head and looks to the ceiling, like it has an instruction manual for dealing with me. “Uh, you haven’t left me on the side of the road yet…”

“Don’t get too excited, love. Just because I don’t kick puppies, doesn’t mean I don’t want to occasionally.”

“You’re so full of shit. You’re totally a dog person.”

I wouldn’t know. I’ve never had a pet to compare. The closest I ever got to one was watching Halle’s goldfish when she spent the weekend with Vance at some convention. Even then, I overfed the shit out of him. Who knew fish could gain weight?

“Remington, are we going to talk about last night?”

Now, she’s just making it too easy. “What happened last night?”

“Remington.”

I cock a brow. “Eden.”

“Are you serious right now?”

It’s hilarious that she expected better from me. In what universe have I ever been an easy person to deal with?

“Are you really going to act like nothing happened last night?”

Her innocence is adorable. “What happened? All I remember is you coming outside and climbing onto my lap and begging me to fuck you while the neighbors watched.” I shake my head and cluck my tongue. “And here you were scolding me for smoking in the same hemisphere as their kids. At least I wasn’t trying to flash my tits and scar precious little minds.”

She doubles over and laughs so hard she has to rest her forehead on the table.

“You are a fucking liar,” she finally manages when she can breathe.

“I am a fucking saint, is what I am. I could have let you embarrass yourself, but instead, I held you until your horny ass fell asleep.”

---