Page 43 of The Pretender

“I keep hearing a lot of talking but no tripod,” I chide. “I’ll meet you in the living room when you finally manage to retrieve it.”

Really, I just want to get out of here since she’s slid partly under the bed, and her ass is sticking up and although it’s partially covered by her hoodie, I can still see the curve of her cheek, peeking out from underneath the fray of her jean shorts.

Yes, another room is good. And cold water. And visions of grandma.

“Thank goodness,” she returns, her voice muffled from under the bed. “You’re getting on my nerves.”

Ditto.

I turn from the door, leaving Valentina in her search for my shit and flop down on the couch, staring up at the ceiling. My dick is calmer without her ass all perky in front of us, but he’s longing for another peek, even though we both know it would be terrible for our sanity. Her pretending to be my girlfriend for eight weeks will fuck me up. Looking at her ass for longer than necessary might irrevocably damage the desire to ever look at another ass that isn’t hers.

It’s best my dick and I stay put right out here.

“Found it!” she hollers from the bedroom.

I grin. She hid the damn thing pretty well. I would have never found it on my own.

“‘Bout time!”

“Shut up. Why do you always have to be such a dick?” Her voice is close, and I jerk my head to the side and see her standing right above me.

“What are you? A ninja? Make noise and whine like most girls,” I say, glaring at my dusty tripod in her hand.

“I think you do enough whining for the both of us,” she pops back, blowing a dust ball off the tripod before extending the legs and setting it up. “Where do you want to do this lame dance?”

This is why I’m going to hell.

“On the back patio.” I grin.

“No.” Her voice is firm, and I knew that would be her response. In fact, I was counting on it.

I sigh, running my hand through my hair. It’s mussed because I was too busy keeping myself upright in the shower to give a fuck about combing it when I got out. “We’ll just have to do it in my bedroom.” Where I wanted all along.

“Why?” Her voice raises, making my dick hard again. “Why can’t we do it right here in the living room?”

I stand and adjust my crotch. “Because I don’t have a full-length mirror in here and I need to see what I’m doing.” I give her body a cursory glance. “I can’t post a video when we aren’t in sync.”

Frankly, I just want to watch her.

“I also think it’d be a perfect video to post showcasing our new relationship.” I flash her a smirk that I know gets on her nerves. “Don’t you think?”

I have zero ideas about how this plan of mine is supposed to work. All I know is that our fans go crazy when they see us together. So while there were only rumors of us from the party, I solidified them last night after Vee and I had Juan take a picture of us sitting together under the Edison lights in the parking lot, sharing a romantic (insert eye roll here) dinner in the parking lot before the salmonella kicked in.

Afterward, Vee came over and we drank a little moonshine until we were both tipsy enough to edit the picture and post it. As you can imagine, the photo went viral, and when I woke up this morning, I had several emails regarding potential new ads and sponsorships on my page.

So, while I might not have a plan for how to go about winning this contest, I do know that the ‘non-plan’ is working. Vee and I are dominating the internet again. And although the picture we posted was not part of the contest, it ramped up our followers so that when we do post our entry as a team, we’ll bring both of our fan bases along with us and kick Malcolm’s ass out of the running.

Vee looks up to the ceiling, something she does when she’s thinking. “Yeah, you’re right.”

My stomach dips. “Did you just say—”

She doesn’t let me finish. “Shut up and do not say another word.” She shakes her head. “What I’m saying is that I agree that keeping our fanbases happy will not only increase the believability of us as a couple, but it would also help our numbers when we post our entry video.”

See? I told you I was right. If your fans love you as a couple, they will support anything you do, and if we have a bad ‘breakup’ then, hopefully, they pick sides and stay with me to nurse my ‘broken heart.’

But instead of offering Vee a high five for thinking as brilliantly as I do, I shrug like there’s a small possibility that she’s onto something. “Probably. We won’t know for sure until we try.”

It’ll work; I have zero doubts at this point. Taking pictures and picking at each other comes naturally to us. It's the kissing and cuddling part we’ll have to work the hardest at.

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