Page 71 of The Potter

One that Logan couldn’t endure without my help. Just like Halle.

“And did you fix his scars?”

I nod, swallowing past a lump in my throat. “But he died under my care.”

It feels like someone else says the words as Halle’s arms go around my shoulders, her tears wetting my neck. “Oh, Vance. I’m so sorry. No one should have to endure a loss of a friend.”

But that’s not all of it. “His airway collapsed during recovery. As soon as we gave him something for the pain.” My chest feels like ten thousand flames are burning me from the inside out. “Subsequently, he suffered respiratory arrest.” My words are flat and clinical. “And no life saving measures could get him back.”

Halle’s arms tighten around me, and I hope she’s understanding why I turned down her case. “The coroner said Logan had undiagnosed sleep apnea. The sedation in the pain medication caused the hypoxia, which ultimately resulted in his death.”

In my best friend’s death.The man I stayed up all night studying with. The man I stood beside while he married the woman of his dreams.

In one moment, I ruined two lives.

Halle’s tears drip down my shirt. “You didn’t know.”

“It doesn’t matter. I was his surgeon. We’re the captain of the ship. I ordered the medication. It was my responsibility to ensure his safe recovery.” The same thing I told her a few weeks ago.

I take a breath, swallowing down the pain. “I walked away after they administered the medicine. I was on the opposite wing when they called the code, announcing he wasn’t breathing, and they needed help. But I was too late.”

Pulling back, I push on Halle’s shoulders so she’ll look at me. “You had the same issue during your last hospital stay.”

She shakes her head, slapping my hands away. “My case is different.”

“It’s not.” Does she think I didn’t look at her file thoroughly? “Halle, I can’t even go into the operating room without my hands shaking and me blacking out. You don’t want me as your surgeon.”

Wiping the tears from her eyes, she shakes her head defiantly. “Everyone makes mistakes.”

I offer her a sad smile. “But mine comes with a lawsuit and an offer of a settlement, requiring the closure of my practice and my license revoked.”

I take a deep breath. “My mistake is final.”

Halle

He believes his mistake is final.

“So, that’s all you get? One fuckup?”

Vance turns to me, his eyes seemingly vacant. “My fuckup cost a man his life and a woman, her husband.”

But… “It’s not like you purposely tried to kill him, Vance. You didn’t know about his condition.”

Vance stares off behind my head, refusing to look at me. “He trusted me with his life, and I let him down. Now, I can’t atone for what happened. My hands tremble, and I black out anytime I get close to the operating room.”

He swallows, the lines in his face deepening with pain. “Calista wants to take my license… I’m starting to think that’s the best thing I could do for my patients.”

I wrap my arms around his shoulders. This man needs a serious hug. “Calista is grieving, but allowing her to take your license in the process would not only be detrimental to you but a tragedy to your patients. You’re the best there is, Dr. Potter. Losing your talent and your passion for helping others would destroy the very people you’re trying to help.”

Lifting my chin, Vance meets my eyes. “You should never allow another person to destroy your dreams, Peach. Especially not me.”

I understand what he’s saying. I do. While I know it’s insane to give others power over your life, I do. Well, I did.

Caleb, my ex-boyfriend, destroyed my future with one argument, and I let him. For over a year. But then, I placed my happiness, my future, in another—Dr. Potter. I understand Vance would rather me put my hope and dreams in myself. And I am.

I just need Dr. Potter’s help to achieve them.

Pulling Vance close, I place a kiss on his lips. “Hope is a dangerous emotion. Sometimes it fulfills us, and sometimes, it kills us. The question is, which side would you rather fight for, because there is no question that you are the hope for your patients, whether you want to be or not.