Page 29 of The Walls of Levi

Levi is a very private person. Before coming here, I had no idea these people existed. Nothing has ever been said about them in association to Levi and from the looks of it, they all wanted it that way.

“Ok. I can’t tell you everything. You know what his parents did to him. Now, he gets lost in the dark when he’s overwhelmed. Eventually he comes out and he’s better now at getting himself out, but I don’t know how to help him right now. When he gets lost in there, he turns into someone else. Someone dark and angry. I want to try something with you.”

I ponder over his words. I’ve never seen someone lose themselves like he’s describing Levi. I know that I will try to help in any way I can, though. I don’t know what it is about Levi, but I’m drawn to him.

“What do you want me to do?”

“This is a trial thing. I will be right here so don’t worry. Go up behind him, put your hand on his shoulder and whisper in his ear. Tell him you’re here. Tell him to stay. Just say something. See what happens.”

When he said not to worry, I immediately started to worry. What could go wrong? So many things are going through my mind and none of them are good.

I slowly walk up behind him and watch as his shoulders rise and fall with his breathing. He is inhaling and exhaling heavily. I can hear it as I get closer. I wonder what is going through his mind, but then again, I don’t really know if I want to know. I also wonder what set him off. He was just fine when I came out here earlier. He was talking to Micah and everything was cool.

Once I get right behind him, I turn and look at Zant over my shoulder. He’s came a little closer, but not much. He’s giving us space. Whether I like it or not, I decide to trust Zant.

I turn back around and slowly put my hand on Levi’s shoulder. I feel his muscles as they almost vibrate under my palm. This must be what pure rage feels like. Leaning down so my mouth is right next to his ear, I hold my breath for a few beats. Then I start whispering.

“Levi, hey. It’s Kathleen. You’ve got to come back to me. We need you out here.” I wait a little bit to see what happens. When nothing does, I say something else. Something that could be very close to the truth. Despite the fact I just met him, and he rescued me from being kidnapped, I feel something for him. Being in the car with him for two hours and chatting with him – he’s easy to talk to. He’s funny and laid back. He’s a genuine guy.

“Levi,Ineed you out here. Come back to me.” I whisper it so softly that only he can possibly hear it.

Suddenly, he takes a deep breath and lets it out. I slowly pull back from him but not removing my hand just yet. Watching as he blinks, I see Zant walking towards us from the side.

Levi looks up at me then at Zant. “It happened again, didn’t it?”

“Yea man. It’s ok though. How are you feeling?”

He rubs his hands over his face and I remove mine from his shoulder. I wonder if he heard me.

“Tired.”

“Let’s get you inside,” I say, stepping back from him. I don’t know if I need to touch him anymore. I want to. The musty, manly smell of him is still in my nose, and I would really love to put my nose to his neck and just inhale him. I don’t though.

He stands up and I walk ahead of them back inside. Zant probably wants to talk to him, and I’m not sure if they want me out here.

Chapter 19

Levi

“How long was I out for?”

“About ten minutes. Once Katie started talking to you, you came out pretty quickly. I didn’t know if she was going to work, but I’m glad she did.

“Micah used to be the one.” Zant nods his head. The last couple of times I’ve lost to the darkness, Mi hasn’t been able to help. It upsets her and that makes it worse.

I hate this shit. It’s like the demons just come and smother me. They won’t let me out and no matter how much fighting and yelling, they just keep piling on top of me. I’ve gotten better, but I would love to be able to keep them away for good. To function normally when I get angry. It has everything to do with my parents. I know it does.

When I was home and they would get high, they would beat me. I learned at an early age to retreat into myself. At first, it became a coping mechanism. I would check out. They would do whatever they wanted, and I had no clue until I woke up later. I would have blood and bruises everywhere. That made me angry and after a while, the anger would take me into the darkness too. Now, anything to do with anger, evil, or my parents sends me into the dark.

I take deep breaths to lower my heart rate and then I look at Z.

“So, what do we do now?”

“I don’t know. He doesn’t know where y’all are right now, so as long as we keep it that way, you’re both safe. We’ve got to figure it out, though. They don’t give up easy.”

“Yea. Neither do I.”

Suddenly my phone starts to ring, and I pull it from my pocket. I see Ron’s name across the screen and I swipe it to answer.