Page 56 of Not That Impossible

“Happy Tuesday,” I muttered, and walked off.

“Jasper!” Liam called after me.

I turned around.

“Thanks.”

“You’re welcome.”

“And for the doughnuts and coffee.”

It took me a moment to work out his meaning. I tried to smile but couldn’t quite manage to scrape one up. I lifted a hand, and walked away.

I felt his eyes on me the whole time.

13

Adam strode up and down my kitchen. “Jasper,” he said, “it was amazing. I always knew it would be good between Ray and me, but holy shit. Holyshit.” He stopped and whirled around, an expectant look on his face.

“Wow,” I said.

“More than wow,” he told me, and resumed pacing. “Way more than wow. I’ve had a lot of sex, but that?” He stopped again, this time on the opposite side of the kitchen table from where I was slumped. He flattened both hands on the table, leaning into them to say with intensity, “All we did was kiss and grind a bit, and that was the best I’ve ever had. Ever.” He straightened up. “In my life.”

“Sounds amazing,” I said. It came out flat. I tried again. “I’m so happy for you!” Nope, still pretty unconvincing. “Yay!” For fuck’s sake.

Adam was so wrapped up in rhapsodising about Ray that he didn’t notice my pitiful attempts at celebrating the upward trajectory of his love life.

It was (definitely) Wednesday morning, and he’d been waiting for me when I came back from my daily run.

I’d woken up and glared at my ceiling for a full five minutes before I rolled out of bed and sullenly dragged on my waterproof running kit. It was still dark and I didn’t even have to check outside to know it was raining—it was clattering hard against the window.

I stretched in the hall to warm up, let myself out of the house, and set off at a steady pace. It was a slog.

My morning runs usually helped me set the mood for the day. I’d look around, listen to the birds, watch the sun come up, say hello to any early dog-walkers. Even if it was raining, I didn’t usually mind.

Today, I minded.

Today, my mood was already set and had been from the moment I opened my eyes.

My mood was shite.

I gritted my teeth and forced myself on through dark and miserable streets, rain lashing my face even though I’d pulled my hood up and cinched it so tight all you could see was my nose.

Liam had hurt me. The worst part of it was, I’d set myself up for it.

What had I thought, seriously? Taking him coffee and doughnuts like a fool. He’d probably laughed at me when I slunk off.

No, he wouldn’t have.

He’d have chalked it up to one more incident of Jasper making a prat out of himself, forgotten all about it, and gone on with his day.

At the time, I hadn’t thought it was anything other than a friendly gesture. I was still riding high after our connection. The endorphins were still cascading through my body.

With a little distance, I felt like an idiot. I had no excuse.

He’dtoldme one time, I’d agreed to it, and then not twelve hours later, I’d grabbed for more.

I was a hopeless, foolish man even more in love with the arsehole who was quite happy to hit it and quit it, and there wasn’t anything I could do about it.