Page 120 of Not That Complicated

Why wasn’t he saying anything?

I didn’t know whose heart was beating the fastest at that point.

A faint noise came from Adam’s throat.

I bit my lip in anticipation, but it must have been air escaping. He didn’t say anything.

He just stared at me.

I felt my face change from bold to hopeful and then twist into a grimace as heat flooded my cheeks.

“Um,” I said. “So that burst out unexpectedly.”

His fingers tightened on my hips. If I’d had any idea of putting some distance between us, I set it aside. I wasn’t going anywhere. I’d have to pry him off first.

That was encouraging, yes?

I leaned back enough to flatten my hands over his hot, tense chest. “Not like the whole move-in-with-me thing burst out. Sorry about that. I definitely don’t know where that came from. I mean, I’d still like it but—nope.” I shook my head.

“No?” he said faintly.

“No! I will not get off track. I love you. It popped out but it was deliberate. I planned it.”

“You...?”

“Planned it. I was always going to tell you tonight. It was going to be less of an ambush, though. It wasn’t a mistake. I think we need to be clear on that. I came here with the sole purpose of telling you I love you.”

His fingers tightened again, almost painfully. He swallowed. The sound was loud in the otherwise silent room.

They had great double glazing here. Dad would be impressed. Couldn’t hear even the buzz of traffic outside.

Okay, I didn’t give a shit about the double glazing and I definitely didn’t want to be thinking about my dad.

I bumped my hips into Adam’s. “That’s about it. I never said it was a complicated plan. I’ve been thinking about us. A lot.”

“Us,” he said.

“You know, you’re not responding quite how I anticipated? And there is more to the speech, but I’m not sure at this point that you want to hear it?”

He barely even let me finish. “I want to hear it.”

“In a general,I’m curious as to what nonsense he’s coming outwith kind of way? Or in an,I am invested in the outcomekind of way?” I drew a big circle over his chest, staring at it as if absorbed. Bullseye, right over his heart. “Because I’ll tell you either way, I think you deserve that, but it turns out this is harder than I thought it would be. Didn’t think that was possible, because I thought it was going to be nightmare hard, but there you go.” I patted his chest.

“Why do I deserve it?”

“It came to my attention that I haven’t treated you terribly well.”

He frowned. “That’s not true.”

I reached up, cupped his face, and looked him in the eye. “I didn’t treat you like you deserve to be treated.”

He still looked puzzled.

I eased my hold and stroked a thumb over his bottom lip. “You are so, so beautiful,” I said. His mouth curved and his tongue flicked out. “But I need you to know that I love you despite that.”

He gazed at me sombrely. “Ray,” he whispered. “Are you trying to tell me that you love me for my personality?”

“Yes,” I slumped with relief. “Exactly, thank you. At first, I’ll admit it, I was dazzled.”

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