Page 55 of More Than a Little Spark

“Does he need something?It’s no big deal to pause what I’m working on.It’s not due until sometime early next year.I’m just getting a head start.”

“The security guard called and told him that you’ve been up here late every single night this week.As soon as Austin heard that, he grabbed his shoes to come up here.Then the security guard added that he’d seen you crying.So Austin asked me to come with him.He’s downstairs.I’m supposed to text him and let him know if there are tears.”

“He’s probably allergic to tears.”

“Absolutely.”She pulls a chair close to my desk.“I don’t want to pry, but I do want to know if you’re okay.”

I nod, tears burning my eyes.“Just a breakup.I’m in the do-anything-to-avoid-lying-in-bed-awake stage.And I’m sharing my location with my friend, so someone knows where I am at all times.”I snag a tissue out of the box and dab my eyes.“I thought he was the one.”

Zoe opens her arms, and I accept a hug from her, even though I really don’t know her well at all.I do my best not to blubber all over her shirt.

“Work gives me something to do.That’s why I’ve been so productive.”

“Don’t make yourself sick, though.Your body needs sleep.Even if your heart and brain are against the idea.I’ve been there.I know it’s hard.”

“Tell Austin that I’m okay.I’ll pack up and go home.But I can’t promise that I’ll sleep.”

“I’ll tell him.And don’t set an alarm.”She waves as she walks back to the elevator.“Don’t be shocked if our car is in the lot when you go down.Knowing Austin, he’ll want to be sure you get into your car safely.”

“I won’t be long.”I shut down my computer and gather my things.I guess drowning myself in work is no longer an option.Tomorrow, I’ll have to get ice cream.And some Lactaid.

It’s beenthree weeks since that last kiss in the rain, and progress has been made.I’m sleeping again.Finally.And I no longer fight the urge to text Carson every time I look at my phone.

But Carson has been on my mind all day, so I give in to my impulse and send off a text.

Me:Hi.I was thinking about you.I hope things are better with Fred.

Dots dance on the screen.Then stop.And so does my breathing.I should not be this invested in a text.

Carson:Things are better.He didn’t snap back to his old self overnight, but over the last couple of weeks, he’s opened up more.Almost back to normal.

Me:Great to hear.I hope you’re doing good.

He sends a thumbs-up.

As much as I want to send another text and prolong the interaction, I don’t.Carson is still getting over the breakup, just like me.And making it harder for him isn’t my goal.Besides, knowing that Fred is better only confirms my fear.I was the problem.

I dive back into work.Then promptly at five o’clock, I shut off my computer and grab my purse.I’m meeting Rose and Dallas for dinner in Stadtburg, and I need to change before heading that way.

When I pull into the parking lot at the restaurant, the first thing I see is Carson’s truck.It’s a small town.And this is the most popular place to eat.But normally, he has dinner at the ranch.

I stare through the windshield, deciding whether or not to go inside.

Dallas’s truck turns into the lot, and I get out of the car.Avoiding Carson is silly.We’re both adults.I can be friendly without throwing myself at him.Or sobbing.Although that second one will be harder.

There is a large group from the ranch, and when the guys see Dallas, a couple of them wave.Parker shifts, then points to seats next to him.

Great.We’ll all be sitting together.

Dallas, Rose, and I get our barbecue, and we wander over to the table.I give Carson a friendly wave, but thankfully, he’s sitting far away from where the vacant seats are.But unfortunately, I end up sitting right across from Fred.It’s not that I mind, but I’ve probably ruined his dinner.

As soon as I sit down, I realize that I didn’t fill my cup.“Rose, I’ll be right back.My cup is empty, and I didn’t grab any silverware.”

Fred jumps up.“I’ll get stuff for you.What do you want to drink?”

“Sweet tea.Thank you so much.”I try not to look at Carson because I can feel him watching as Fred walks back to the table.“That was really kind of you.”

“You’re welcome.”He stares at his tray and stabs at a slice of brisket.“How are you?”

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