Page 60 of Man Advantage

I closed my eyes and sighed. Well. This was a great train of thought to kick off the day.

I got up and shuffled in to take a shower. That helped a little, even though it gave my mind time to wander down some depressing tracks. By the time I was drying myself off, I’d resolved to text Bryan later and see if I could at least chat with the boys.

First things first… breakfast.

As I came downstairs, I didn’t see Cam anywhere, but when I went to pour my coffee, I realized he was outside on the back deck.

And I was halfway across the deck before I realized he was wearing a pair of gym shorts and…

And that was it.

Though we were into October now, the summer heat was still hanging on, and apparently he intended to take full advantage while it lasted.

Oh my God. Nearly his entire incredible body was on full display. One look, and my brain went completely blank except for how much I wished I could trace my fingertips over every inch of him. Or my tongue. I wanted to?—

I shook myself and looked away before I embarrassed myself.

Of course Cam picked that moment to twist around and look up at me. “Hey. How was the road trip?” He paused. “I mean… aside from your ex’s dickcheese of a boyfriend.”

I laughed dryly as I took a seat on one of the other deck chairs. “Aside from him and that one game, it was all right.”

He smiled. “That’s good.”

I half-shrugged. “I got through it.”

Cam studied me. “You okay?”

I nodded. “Yeah. Yeah. Just…” I wanted to say it was jetlag. And flying in stupidly late. And… something other than the truth. But this was Cam, and I could tell him the truth. As I gazedat my kids’ scattered toys in the otherwise empty yard, and my shoulders sagged, and I wasn’t sure I could hold back the truth if I wanted to. “Just sucks, being away from them and coming home just in time for them to go to Bryan’s place.”

He winced. “I figured that was still bothering you.”

“Of course it is.” I huffed a sharp, frustrated breath. “The only time I’ve seen my boys lately has been when Bryan brought them to a game, plus theoneday I had with them before I hit the road.” I fought back a surge of unwelcome emotions. “It fucking sucks.”

“Yeah, it does. And it shouldn’t be like that.” He flailed a hand in the general direction of the road. “You guys live so close together—it’s stupid that there can’t be some flexibility.”

“Right? And it’s…” I pressed my lips together as I tried to gather my thoughts.

Cam tilted his head. “What?”

I thought about it a bit more, then sighed. “It’s not just that I don’t see them. It’s whodoessee them. I’m gone all the time,andtheir dad’s boyfriend hates me.” I raked my hand through my hair and exhaled hard. “Their dad’s not too crazy about me either. I’m just worried…” I chewed my lip, unsure how to finish.

Cam wasn’t so hard up for words: “You’re worried that’ll rub off on the kids.”

Wincing, I nodded. “Even if no one’s talking trash, I mean…” I dropped my hand into my lap and held Cam’s gaze. “The boys aren’t stupid, you know? They can pick up on the tension. And the fact that I’m not around. Like… a lot.”

He tilted his head. “Is that the core of the issue? Not that Bryan’s camp is going to turn the boys on you, but you being gone?”

My throat tightened, and I avoided his eyes as I nodded again. “Especially now.” My shoulders sagged. “What if they notice that when they come to my house for my custody weeks…I’m gone?” I looked at him through my lashes, and shame coiled around my heart as I whispered, “The way the hockey schedule is, they could goweeksbetween seeing me.”

“That’s not your fault, though,” he said softly. “They know you have to go with the team.”

“But what’s it going to do to them when they keep coming over to my house and it’s just you?” I winced. “I… I don’t mean you’re not?—”

“I know what you mean.” Cam’s smile was gentle. “I get it. You’re worried they’re going to start feeling your absence more because you’re gone when they’re supposed to be with you.”

I flinched and nodded.

He gave a quiet scoff. “Kind of have to wonder if that was Bryan’s plan.”

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