Page 87 of Inside the Sun

Seriously, anyone could see us right now! We’re just off the edge of the lawn, a few dozen feet from the patio and maybe a hundred from the kitchen doors.

My whole body tightens, not just with danger, but with something electric.

Sun is basically naked. That tiny speedo hides almost nothing. My eyes drop to his crotch, and I see the shape of his dick, full and swollen.

He stops right in front of me, and I just stare, scrambling for a good excuse to look away.

Why? Why can’t I find any?

I’m grateful I’ve got the trimmer in my hands. I angle it so it blocks my own crotch, which is reacting way too much.

His eyes search my face, probably flushed. From the heat, but mostly from arousal.

His nostrils flare; he can definitely smell it. My pre-cum is giving me away. I’ve been hard since the moment he got in the water.

And then he says it:

"You want me."

There’s something in his face, maybe it’s supposed to be seductive, inviting, but it doesn’t land.

What I see instead is something vulnerable. Maybe even scared. Unsure. Is he afraid of what I’ll say? Afraid I’ll reject him? There’s a silent plea in his eyes.

"I told you not to do this, Sun," I manage, my voice tight. "But I can see it cost you something to say that, so I’ll give you the answer you want. Yeah. You’re attractive as hell. It’d behardfor any healthy man to deny that. Pun very much intended. But you shouldn’t be saying this while standing next to me in the open, where anyone could see us:soldati, cameras, whoever’swatching from the fortress windows… They’ll kill us for it, do you understand?"

Sun trembles slightly, maybe from the cold water, maybe from nerves.

"I want him to kill me," he says, voice cracking, desperation seeping through. "I want it to end."

I stare at him. God, this boy is teetering on the edge of real despair.

"Sun… don’t say that. There’s always hope—"

"No! You don’t understand. I’m trapped here!"

Instinctively, I raise my hands to stop him, almost as a defensive gesture.

"Sun, please, don’t lose hope. And I’m sorry, but I need to say it: my case is different. I want to live. That’s why I need you to stop putting us in risky situations. If you don’t care about yourself, which is tragic enough, then think about me."

That came out terribly. Like I only care about myself. Which isn’t true. Summer and Moon are the ones who should matter most, but… somehow Sun matters too. It hurts me to hear his words, his wish to die…

Sun makes a small, almost sobbing sigh. "Forgive me, I didn’t mean to endanger you, I just… I want to feel something. Like I did before he brought me here."

I’m quiet for a moment. "Sun, I couldn’t want anything from you anyway, not when I know you’re being raped daily. Don’t you get it? What kind of man would I be if I ignored that?"

Sun closes his eyes for a second and nods slowly.

"I know. I understand how it looks to you. But it doesn’t hurt, not physically. It only hurts here." He taps his temple with his finger. "And I never finish with him. I’m basically his sex slave. He takes everything, and I just… I want to take something back. Anything." His voice is barely a whisper, trembling.

I take a deep breath because I finally realize what he’s actually asking of me!

Sex. He wants to have sex with me.

Talking is getting harder, my chest tightening with pressure.

"Knowing that he’s abusing you, only proves that I can’t take a single step closer to you."

To emphasize my words, I take a step back and say, "Please, Sun. Don’t risk your life. Or mine. Around here, the walls really do have eyes. And if we don’t stop this now, it’s going to end horribly. And death itself may not be the worst thing. Keep that in mind."

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