Page 9 of The Promises We Break

“I will later. It’s time to gooooooo!” He runs out of the room, where all the guys are gathered at the mini kitchen island, shots in hand.

“Hudson, hurry your ass up,” Jake yells as he hands me my shot.

Kobi holds his fist out to me, since he’s the only one I haven’t seen yet, and I connect with a knuckle bump.

Seamus holds up the small glass with clear liquid. I’m thankful they decided to go with vodka tonight and not tequila. Not sure that will make much of a difference tonight, but at least tomorrow, the hangover will hurt a little less. “To Jake and his non-bachelor, bachelor party!”

“To Jake!!” “Jakey.” “Let’s goooooo!” A mix of different salutes overlap each other before the night begins. Hopefully these bastards won’t get me arrested.

5

EMBER

“Idon’t know which one of you ladies was the brilliant mastermind that planned the H2O IV van coming by earlier, but you are the real MVP. If it weren’t for that, I don’t think I would have made it out tonight,” Suzy says as she finishes pressing her lips together, spreading the ruby red color, giving her plump lips a pop against the all white outfit she is wearing. A tight bodysuit donned with a fluffy, short tutu skirt. She looks like a ballerina bride, minus the ballerina shoes. The heels she is wearing are definitelynotballerina shoes.

“We couldn’t have the bride-to-be only lasting through part one of her ‘Fling before the Ring’!” Dana screams out of the shuttle bus window that’s currently bumping its way through the strip. Figuratively, by way of the loud as hell speakers, and literally, by way of the incessant bouncing that occurs with every tiny pothole we hit.

Actually, shuttle bus sounds a little too prude here. I suppose I should call it what it really is: a party van. Equipped with alcohol, snacks, incredibly loud speakers, and a stripper pole directly in the middle of the platform of the vehicle. It’s built for at least a dozen bodies, far too large for our modestbachelorette party of four, but Dana spared no expense when planning this for her sister. She rented it for the entire night, so we always had a ride to any place we wanted to go.

We are currently on route toTemptation, an upscale strip club for both men and women. After Dana thoroughly researched all the options, she decided this was where we were going to spend our last night in Vegas. Yesterday was full of shopping and massages during the day and dancing last night. Tonight, though… Tonight is going to be ‘Wet ‘n Wild’, according to Dana. And yes, she air-quoted to clarify it would be the sameWet ‘n Wild—girls gone crazy edition. All of us being born and raised in a tiny Missouri town, we were all ready to let loose.

I’ve never been to Vegas before, and I’ve never done anything like this, so I have no idea what to expect. The excitement and anxiety are currently going to war in my head, but excitement is winning.

Last night was fun, nothing too crazy, just dancing. But tonight will be one of the reasons they created the mottoWhat happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas.

The girls are already drunk. I’ve always been reserved when it comes to drinking. I’ve never liked how it makes me feel. Out of control, aloof, and the next day is always full of regret. Nothing good ever seems to come out of it, so why bother? Suzy insisted I drink, and I buckled under that peer pressure, so here I am, three shots later, and far too tipsy, too early into the night.

Last night, after only one shot, I spilled my guts to the girls about meeting Hudson on the plane. They thought I was crazy running out of the plane like I did but, Christ, he was the sexiest man I had ever met.

In my entire life.

Not that I’ve had much experience with men in general.

But Hudson. I don’t know that I have ever had such a physical response to someone before.

There hasn’t been a spare moment where I haven’t thought about him and those dark chocolate eyes and perfect smile. At first, I thought maybe he was just a friendly guy, but when the flight was coming to an end and he asked to see me again, I saw a desire in his eyes I’ve never felt from anyone before. One that mirrored my own, so much so that it scared the shit out of me.

Using the excuse of having a boyfriend to men that ask me out has always been my go-to response to avoid relationships, even when I wasn’t actually in one. But when he asked, I couldn’t lie. I didn’t want to tell him I had a boyfriend when I didn’t, not like the guy on the plane that approached me before Hudson returned. For some reason, I didn’t want to lie to Hudson, but I couldn’t muster the courage to say yes.

I don’t want to have casual sex, and more importantly, I won’t get into a relationship that will limit my options. I’ll be moving soon, hopefully. No, not hopefully. I will be moving. Even if I don’t get that job. I’m ready. My time in Weston, Missouri is over. If I have to stay for one more wedding, bridal shower, baby shower, or anything related to marriage and babies, I might actually bury myself under an outhouse and let that be my demise.

All of my friends have since been married, and some divorced, then remarried, since high school. I was fortunate enough to put myself through college and keep my focus there, against the wishes of my parents. Well, specifically my dad. You would think he would support my goals the same way he did my brothers, but to him, my education was a waste of money.

My mom insisted the entire time that I needed to stop going to school. I begged her to help me with the tuition and cost of all the books and supplies, but she took my father’s side, as she always does. She informed me, daily, that it was pointless to get a degree when my focus should be on marrying a rich man. ‘Why work when you can have a man take care of you?’

She has always cared more about what he thinks, does, says,and hardly has a thought of her own. My father grew up incredibly wealthy, and he inherited his father’s fortune. My mother’s family barely made ends meet. She’s confessed more than once she will do anything to keep my father happy because he affords her the life she never knew she could have. That status, that wealth, is what she craves more than anything.

She loves it more than she loves her own children. Her only daughter included.

He provides her the life I know she has always wanted. It definitely doesn’t help that all my friends went off and did nothing more than get married and have babies. It’s like our little town of Weston stayed frozen in history. Women don’t have a life of their own. They are not individuals enhancing the life of their spouses, they aredefinedby their title, ‘his wife.’ My mother being the matriarch of the town for that exact motto. Being at the beck and call of her husband, my father, the most old-fashioned man in human existence.

I just wish he treated me the same way he treats my brothers.

Instead, they just continued to push my ex on me so forcefully it ended up driving me even further away. Which is why I’ve applied at every job anywhere in the country. I’ve been grounded, rooted to an unwanted life in Weston, and I’m over it.

I want so much more than that, and I’m tired of feeling guilty over it.

“I’m ready,” I whisper to myself as I look out the window, the Vegas strip’s neon lights flashing by.

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