Page 189 of Marked

Huh, I hadn’t really considered that. This was his town, not mine. He’d suggested this place when he’d called me in to help with the shifter killings.

“Sorry,” I grumbled. “I’m not in the best mood.”

“I can tell.” Ollie took a sip of his beer. “What’s up?”

“Can we just hang for a minute?” I asked, unable to meet his eyes. “I need some quiet, but I don’t want it alone.”

“Sure thing, my man,” Ollie responded.

For the next ten minutes, we sat in companionable silence. It wasn’t uncomfortable. It was welcoming and warm, which was exactly what I needed. No pretense, no need to speak. It was the kind of silence only two friends could enjoy together.

When my drink was done, I slid the glass away and sat up straight, trying to think of where to begin. Part of the issue was that my entire worldview had been turned on its head. How did you recalibrate this late in the game? Over the last couple decades, I’d used that story of being abandoned as a shield. It had gone hand in hand with the bad-boy persona I’d cultivated for myself. Only now did I realize what a crock of shit that had all been. An act to deflect the pain I felt inside.

Those issues had snowballed until I could barely see who the real Nate was. Taking the abandonment of my parents as a symbol, I’d eschewedallconnections. Every time Ollie had offered to bring me into the pack, I’d declined. It all stemmed from me thinking I wasn’t worthy of acceptance. Looking back, I wondered how different my life would have been had the car accident not happened. Had my whole life been wasted on a lie I’d told myself? Had I kept my distance from everyone simply because I’d chosen to believe the worst?

“Are we gonna be quiet all night?” Ollie finally asked. “Or are you going to tell me what’s on your mind?”

“Oh, nothing,” I said with an exaggerated exuberance. “I’m pretty sure I’m falling for Cameron, we’ve been running for our lives for days, I had someone almost blow my fucking brains out in Detroit—oh! And I forgot to mention I found out my parents never abandoned me and that they died when their car went off a bridge. I think that’s about it.” I snapped my fingers and grimaced. “Wait, that’s not all. Cameron told me the truth about my parents, and I acted like a fucking dumbass.That’sall.”

Ollie stared at me, his mouth moving soundlessly like a fish’s. Then, he blinked. “I’m sorry, but what the fuck?”

“You heard me.”

“I heard you, I can’t comprehend what you said, though. Are you serious?”

Nodding, I waved my empty glass at the passing server. “Yeah. Pretty eventful few days,” I growled.

“Start with Cameron,” Ollie said. “You think you’ve fallen for her?”

“Think so. Fully bonded. Like I said, though, things didn’t go well at the bridge.”

“What did you do? Yell at her?” Ollie asked as the server sat my drink down.

“That would have been better,” I said with a sigh. “I sort of shut down. Emotionally, I mean. It was hard to process.”

“Well, is she right? About your parents?”

“The timing lines up perfectly. The location, the time of year, the age I was, all of it.”

“Shit, Nate. Wouldn’t child services have put that together? Tried to find your next of kin?”

“Doubtful. I was young, but I still remember what a shit show that place was. Fuck, I’m surprised they didn’t fully lose track of me in the system. The poor lady overseeing my case was overworked as all hell. Even a child could see she was stretched thin.” I shrugged. “Doesn’t matter now, though. What matters is today.”

“You were a douche. Big deal.” Ollie shrugged. “We’re guys. We’re known to be douches sometimes. Apologize to her and move on from there.”

“Move onwhere?” I banged my fist on the table, making my drink slosh up against the lip of the glass.

“Here,” Ollie said, looking at me like I’d lost my mind. “The Toronto pack. JC told me you’d asked about joining.” He grinned. “That’s fucking great, man. I’ve been telling you to join up for years now.”

“And what if they don’t let me in?” I asked. “I know what JC said, and how much power he has, but there’s still the chance theelders and whoever else has a say could deny me. I’m a lone wolf, Ollie. You know the stigma.”

Ollie nodded sagely and downed the rest of his beer. “This is actually about Cameron, isn’t it?”

“Yeah.” I hated how miserable and pathetic I sounded. “If they don’t let me in, then I’m nothing but a lone wolf forever. I can’t be with her, then. That’s not a life she could orshouldhave to live. I’ll have to leave her behind to get on with her future, and that’s going to break her heart.”

Ollie ran a hand across his face and let out a long, slow breath before responding.

“Nate, I think you’re overthinking this. You haven’t had much experience with this kind of situation, so I guess that’s to be expected.”

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