Page 61 of Must Love Scoundrels
“Ah, and now we come to the crux of the story.” The breeze blew through the windows, ruffling her hair again. She was so pretty, so lovely that Duncan had to clench his hands to keep from reaching for her.
But she wasn’t his to reach for.
That was the lesson he’d learned all too well.
“Who was Dorothea?”
“She was that year’s diamond of the first water. It was her debut season, and every man looking for a beautiful wife had purchased a field of flowers and sent them to her. She wasn’t wealthy,” he added. “She didn’t have a dowry.”
“So she needed to marry well in order to secure her family’s fortunes.”
“Very much so. She had three sisters, and one of them was older. The scandal of the Season, until I came along, was that Dorothea had come out before her older sister. The family had obviously thought Dorothea would make a better match and decided to risk the gossip as they surely didn’t have enough coin for two Seasons.”
“You and I are not that far apart in age,” Lucy said. “I wonder why I never heard of Dorothea.”
“I imagine you had better things to do than read the Society columns. And you were most likely out by then and less interested in the newest crop of debutantes.”
“I’d never really been interested in them even when I was one. I do remember having to fend off any number of unscrupulous men, though. My mother used to tell me I was a better chaperone than she’d ever be.”
“Would that Dorothea had a more effective chaperone. Her father was rather dull-witted and her mother busy trying to jockey for a place among the friends of the Duchess of Devonshire. Dorothea was left to my devices.”
“You had devices?” She showed her dimples.
“Devices upon devices. After three days, I had Dorothea convinced I was in love with her and she in love with me. I wasn’t the heir to the title or possessed of great wealth, so she feared her father wouldn’t approve of my suit. But I did have that opportunity with the Foreign Office on the horizon. Once I secured that, she hoped he would see me more favorably.”
“But you didn’t care how her father saw you.”
“I did not. I only cared that we had to meet clandestinely.”
“Because her father would not welcome you with open arms.”
“Secrecy makes everything more romantic.”
Lucy took a breath. “Duncan, tell me you didn’t. I must assume this was a young, inexperienced girl. Even a rake knows a girl like that is untouchable.”
“I didn’t want to ruin her. I only wanted a stolen kiss. And after I achieved that, I wanted another and then to kiss her neck, touch her knee...you see where this is leading.”
“Unfortunately.”
“The last night of the house party, things went too far. I never intended to take her virginity. Even at the moment of consummation, in the back of my mind I was thinking,stop. No further.”
He let out a breath but the tightness in his chest didn’t lessen. He’d felt that vise around him ever since he’d looked down at Dorothea’s tear-stained face and realized what they’d done.
Whathe’ddone.
In that moment, he’d felt like crying himself. But he calmed himself by telling Dorothea that no one need ever know. He would take their secret to the grave. And he might have been able to get away with that. She could have married and went on to have a happy life.
If the Marchioness of Nottingham hadn’t walked into the aviary and seen the two of them straightening their clothes. She’d jumped to conclusions—never mind if they were the correct conclusions—and soon had the entire party in an uproar.
“We were discovered,” he told Lucy.
“Duncan,no.” Her hand went to his arm, and she clutched it tightly.
“I remember the world felt as though it were spinning. My head throbbed. I couldn’t think. I just wanted out.”
“Like a trapped beast.”
“Yes. I was trapped, and I knew it. I lashed out and blamed Dorothea. I won’t go into the details of what was said. I’m sure you can imagine. I ended by saying I’d never marry her.”
