Page 25 of Meet Me in Montreal

“I know it won’t make a difference at this point, but I’m sorry.” Vanessa hesitated but Scott didn’t look at her.

All he said was, “Goodbye, Vanessa.”

He barely waited to put the car in drive and peel off with the tires screeching before she opened her front door. She went inside, her heart pounding as rage built, brick after brick stacking on top of each other until they became four walls, closing around her, shutting her in. Alone.

Her first instinct? To get back in her own car, drive over to Santino’s new place. Take her good bottle of his grandfather’svino along for the ride, stuff some cloth into the neck, light that shit up and throw it right through his goddamned window.

Claremore might be able to get away with burning someone’s house down, but she most definitely wouldn’t. Since she didn’t feel like losing her chance at a relationshipandher law license in one night, instead she considered picking up the phone and cursing him the fuck out. Proper, like a lady.

But she did neither. She wouldn’t give that bastard the satisfaction of knowing he’d ruined this for her, and she didn’t have his number anymore anyway.

And as for Scott? It was time to be honest with herself. She didn’t love him. She’d loved the idea of him, the chance of a good life with him, a fulfillment of the life she’d planned for herself. The power couple with great careers, a stable marriage, children. A loving home. She could blame Santino for this, but Scott was right. She’d lied, by omission. It was her fault she was alone and always would be.

Aaannnnd….cue the downward spiral.

The old critical inner bitch loomed up from the pit of her stomach and whispered ugliness in her ear, showed her a reflection of herself she’d tried to ignore.

If Scott had really wanted this to work, he would’ve given you a chance to explain and make it up to him. He would have tried to understand and forgive. But no, he gave you up without a fight because he didn’t want you enough. Like every other man you’ve tried dating since Santino. Like Santino, when he chose Antoinette over you.

And now, after all this, she was going to wind up in Montreal alone after all, with the most wonderful fucking couple ever created by God himself. Bobby, the best son, best doctor, loving husband, and kang to Queen Zoe the Great. Wonderful wife! Mother of the Year!

It exploded out of her with fists balled and she shouted, “Fuck everyone!” into the silent house.

Santino wasn’t going to win. Nope, nope, nope, not gonna win. She was going to live her life, do whatever the fuck she wanted. And Scott? She didn’t need him to be her shield in Montreal. She didn’t need either of them.

Vanessa wiped her face and her hand came away wet and streaked with runny makeup. She didn’t fucking care about dirtying the cute pink pants and wiped the black and blush streaks right on them. She sat down on the couch and pulled out her phone, opened the Holidates app, and changed her profile with jittery, stabbing fingers.

She kept the username, Vanity6, as an ode to the 80s singer and a play on her own name. Same location: Westchester, New York. Event she needed a date for: Montreal Jazz Festival.

This time, no more waiting for a respectable “getting to know him” period. She was going to find someone to have fun with andfuck. She was going to get bent over a balcony with a croissant in one hand and a glass of the best French champagne they had to offer in the other.

And she damned sure was not going to sit there and grin and fake it till she made it in front of Zoe, who would pout sweetly at her with fake pity, and worse, Bobby who would stare at her withrealpity. Nope, not doing it, not enduring any of that.

In the meantime, she needed to book her own flight and hotel yet again. She should have never canceled them on Scott’s behalf in the first fucking place. This is exactly why she shouldn’t depend on anyone. Then she went to bed, if that’s what you called it when you stay up all night staring into the darkness with your fists clenched in rage.

But by morning, a strange calm had descended on her. Since they didn’t have court, she allowed herself to be late for a change. She meditated in the backyard on the grass, then wentinside feeling better. Not great, but a little better. She called and left a message for Jade, who still worked at Dani’s old travel agency and got the best hook-ups. She was certain Jade could find her something decent even this close to the festival.

Montreal or fucking bust.

After she’d left her message, she cooked herself breakfast and ate it at leisure. She was minutes away from leaving for work when the phone rang. It was Jade’s cheerful voice on the other end.

“Hey, girl. Your message said you needed a hotel and a flight to Montreal? I thought you already had your bookings.”

Vanessa sighed shakily, wiping the sudden lone tear that trekked down her face at the question. She liked Jade a lot, but didn’t want to pour out the whole messy story.

“Can you help me find something else? Staying with my brother and his wife isn’t an option, obviously. I want to get up there the weekend before them to have a couple days to myself.”

“On it. I have to warn you, it might be pretty tough this close to the festival, but I’ll see what I can scrounge up.”

“You’re the best.”

“I know,” Jade said cheerfully.

After that, she made the drive to the office. At her cubicle, she glanced around, seeing that everyone was busy and no one was looking for her. Then she checked the time in Parma. It was about four in the afternoon there. Dani answered on the second ring.

“Ciao, bella! Come stai?” Dani sang.

“All settled in?” Vanessa asked casually.

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