Page 45 of Hello Goodbye Amore

She gasped, her hand snapping to her chest. “Me?”

“Yes, you. It was you who insisted that I come back home after college. Family duty and all that. I wasn’t even allowed a few years to try to build something of my own. No. I was ripped away, and if I had stayed, then I would have known if Ricky was mine, and I would have been there for him and his mother. But you and your meddling and thinking you know better than everyone else took that away from me. You took away what might have been. I know in my heart that I’m Ricky’s father. I know it. I see me in him just the way you do. I didn’t before, but I do now. But that doesn’t matter. Ricky has his daddy, the amazing person who raised him after his mother died, the one who did what I wish I could have done. I don’t blame you for all of it, but I still want you to know that it’s your fault because you started the chain of events that led us here.”

Her eyes were as wide as the stark white plates that had been set out for dinner. “I only did what I thought was right. Your father and I wanted you here to join and eventually run the business.” Her explanation seemed halfhearted and not like her at all.

“And in the process, you may have pulled me away from my son, our legacy and the next generation of our family.” He waited as she processed all of this before turning to Chase. “I know my parents want to know, and I do as well, but any test to prove or disprove Ricky’s parentage is up to you. No one here is going topressure you.” Antonello’s throat ached, and he stood and slowly left the room, heading to the main entrance.

“Tio,” Chase said, his footfalls echoing off the stone floor. He stopped at the main door to his family home. “Did you really mean that?”

“Of course I did.” He turned. “They don’t hold all the blame for what happened, but they have to accept some of it, and… the answers are up to you.” He pulled Chase to him. “You are Ricky’s daddy. No matter what. And I am not going to change that. Get the tests, don’t get the tests, none of it is going to matter.”

“It will to your parents, and for what happens to your family,” Chase told him in a soft voice.

“Yes. But it doesn’t matter to me. What does is you and Ricky. That’s what really matters.” He kissed him. “Because I love you. My family isn’t going to understand that now, but they will in time. You make me feel alive and special. You see me and not all the rest of the trappings that go with it.”

Chase chuckled. “Of course I do. I always have.” They shared another kiss until a throat cleared behind them. Antonello closed his eyes to stop himself from jumping back. Then he stepped away and faced his mother, who simply looked at both of them like she was trying to process things.

“Dinner will be ready in ten minutes.”

“Okay. Thank you,” Tio said and turned his attention back to Chase. “Everyone in my life seems to have this amazingly bad sense of timing.”

Chase chuckled. “I can tell. We should get back before—”

“Daddy!” Ricky called as he hurried up, still holding Tio’s father’s hand. “There’s lots more pretty stuff and more people on the ceilings.” He leaned closer to Chase. “And some of them are naked.” He giggled softly.

“Why don’t we all go back into the lounge?” Tio’s father offered, and Tio held Chase’s hand, smiling to himself.

“Take Ricky in. Chase and I will be there in a moment.” Antonello waited until his parents had left with Ricky before cupping Chase’s cheeks in his hands. “I do love you, and I want to figure out a way to have both you and Ricky in my life. Not just for a few more months, but for always.”

Chase smiled and then sighed softly. “I think I’ve wanted that since we were in college together. But let’s see how things go.” Of course Chase was cautious. He wouldn’t be Chase if he were anything else. “Okay?” He smiled and brought his forehead to Tio’s. “I love you too. I do.” But Tio knew Chase had to decide if he could trust those feelings, and Tio was well aware that was up to him.

Chapter 19

THE RESTof the dinner with Tio’s parents went as well as Chase could have expected. Ricky really seemed to like Tio’s father. When he showed Ricky through the house, he apparently told him stories, which Ricky shared some of before he finally settled in bed with Sheepy tucked under his arm.

“I was so scared,” Chase whispered as Tio placed his hand gently on the base of his back. “What am I going to do if he is your son and not mine?” He closed the door.

“You will always be Ricky’s daddy. I mean that. You raised him, and no matter what happens, I won’t take him away from you.”

Chase nodded. “But what happens if we do have a test and it comes back that you’re his father? Your parents are not going to sit back and just accept it, no matter how they acted tonight. They are going to push because Ricky will be the future of their family—your family.”

“I know how they feel, and how you feel, and it isn’t going to change anything. And if Ricky isn’t my biological son, then I’ll feel the same about him and you.” He drew Chase close. “What I want is both of you. I want us to be a family. It may not have been the one we envisioned after college, but it’s still what I want.”

Chase wanted to believe him more than anything. “I’m scared, but we need to know. I’ll order the tests, and we can have them done. This way there won’t be any doubt, and once they come back… then….” He didn’t finish his thoughts, becausethere was no need to. He might as well face facts. There was not going to be any hiding from the truth, not now. He had heard the old adage that the truth could set you free, but in his case, it could pull away everything he had ever wanted.

“Hey, you need to stop worrying. I meant what I said,” Tio told him.

Chase found himself nodding even though he didn’t really believe it. “I know you do. But things have a way of changing.” They had in the past, though Chase wanted to believe what Tio told him. “I won’t go back on what I said. We can order the test kits and send them in. That will tell us once and for all if you are Ricky’s father.” And if he was, then Chase was going to have to explain that to Ricky.

“Okay.” Tio agreed. “Do you want me to stay?”

Chase sighed. “I don’t know. Part of me wants to be alone, but I know if I do that then I’m just going to dwell on this. I made my decision, and I won’t back away from it. I just hope I’m making the right one.” Tio hugged him tightly, and Chase held on to him in return. All he could do now was hope.

“DADDY, THERE’Sa box that came. Does that mean that you’re going to put that swabby thing in my mouth again?” Ricky asked before clamping his mouth shut. “It tasted weird.” He put his hand over his mouth.

“Nope. Those are some papers for work, and we shouldn’t need to do that again.” He had sent in the swab kits for Ricky, him, and Tio at the same time, and he knew he was being ridiculous, but he had checked the website every day to see if there were results. There hadn’t been any news yet. “Why are you so worried about it?”

Ricky shrugged, and Chase lifted him onto his lap. “I heared you talking, and what if the tests say that you aren’t my daddy no more?” Ricky leaned against him, his little body shaking.

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