Page 47 of The Outsider
Asha tentatively reached out to me, watching her hand as though she wasn’t sure that it would obey her, and laid it on my forearm.
“I’m not trying to hurt you,” she said in a softer tone than I’d heard her use since before the attack on the Cave. She sounded more like her old self, and that brought a tear to my eye. “I’m just trying to let you know that you have other options, if you want them. Where we came from, you didn’t have many choices, so you may not realize you have them now.”
She spoke with such sincerity that I faltered. Maybe she was just trying to help. Trying to look out for me, the way she used to, even if she didn’t know how anymore.
“I’ve missed you,” I murmured, a lump in my throat.
Asha sighed. “I’m sorry. I know I’m not who you remember. I just don’t know how to be that girl anymore, you know? But I’m trying—I promise. Don’t give up on me yet.”
I shook my head. “Of course not. Just…I need you to be my friend again, even if you’re not the same. I can handle your pain. But not your indifference.”
My voice trembled, and she clucked her tongue and touched my cheek.
“I’ve always been your friend, girl,” she said. “Ever since you let me copy off your notes in homeroom. That’s when I knew.”
I couldn’t help smiling. “Knew what?”
“That you’re the go-to girl when a hot mess like me needs someone to anchor to.”
“Thanks,” I said with a small laugh. “I’m thrilled to be your anchor in life.”
She grinned in that uncanny way she never used to before, and that familiar sense of unease stirred. I looked up at the stars, sighing.
There would be a reckoning between John and me. Soon.
Chapter 14
Claire
Winter arrived with a vengeance the following day. Soon after we set out, snow began to fall in thick clumps, blanketing the barren forest in shimmering white. Unfortunately, our bikes had taken us as far as they could, and we’d have to finish our journey on foot.
“I know,” John said sympathetically as I gave the abandoned bikes a wistful look. He touched my shoulder, but I shrugged it off.
I was confused and angry. His refusal to share what awaited us in the Valley felt like a betrayal. At the same time, I trusted him enough to believe that he had a reason for keeping it to himself. I didn’t believe everything Asha had said—she clearly had some traumatic history she wasn’t sharing—but I was still frustrated by John’s silence, and it showed. Without his side of the story, it’s hard to know what to believe.
John raised a quizzical eyebrow at my mood, but otherwise let it go. I was glad; now wasn’t a good time to discuss it. Tonight, when we made camp, I’d get answers.
We walked for hours, well into the morning, but as noon arrived, the sky swelled with thick, ominous clouds. The wind picked up, howling in my ears, and the snowfall dramatically increased. In the span of ten minutes, it went from light snow to whiteout conditions, with barely three feet of visibility in any direction.
I held my scarf over my face, but it didn’t stop the wind from whipping my skin mercilessly and chilling me to the bone. I was trying to follow John, but I could hardly see him in the swirling storm.
“Head for that tree!” Kimmy shouted above the wind, but I couldn’t even see the direction she was pointing.
Confused and disoriented, I put one foot in front of the other for as long as I could. Snow kept falling into my eyes, temporarily blinding me, and the voices of the others sounded farther and farther away. I was going the wrong way, but I didn’t know how to get to where they were. If they left me behind, I’d never find them again.
I took a breath and tried not to panic. The wind howled so loudly that I wasn’t even certain they’d hear me even if I yelled. I picked a direction and took three rapid steps…and collided with something solid.
“Ouch!”
“Claire?” John called out.
I’d walked into a wooden wall, barely visible through the storm. I touched it, feeling the outline of logs. A cabin?
“Claire! Where are you?”
“Here!” I yelled back. “I…I think I found something.”
“Stay where you are; I’m coming to get you. Keep talking to me.”
