Page 73 of Matched Up

‘Get out,’ I said when he walked in without knocking.

‘You need to cancel this party; it’s getting out of control.I’m getting messages from Birch High kids who want to come.’

I shrugged.‘So tell them they can’t.’

‘Lexie, what the hell has got into you?And there’s a match on Saturday.You planning to play with a hangover?’

I rolled my eyes.‘Not all of us plan to get as drunk as possible at every opportunity.’

‘It’s your funeral,’ he said and slammed the door behind him.

Whatever.I didn’t care what he thought.I was done thinking about Niall all the time.Football and fun, that’s all I wanted to think about from now on.Definitely not Shane.

I looked perfect on Tuesday night for practice.Hair washed, make-up on.My favourite perfume, my wee shorts.I’d show him what he was missing.And I played my heart out.Megan cheered me on, pointing out all the good things I did and making excuses for my mistakes.

Out of breath, I hung around, trying to catch a glimpse of him, to see if he was as devastated as I was.But in the crowd of boys, I couldn’t see him.Anywhere.

‘Is he here?’Megan was beside me now, her breath completely back to a normal rhythm.

‘I don’t see him.’

‘That’s weird.Hold on, look.Harrison’s telling them something.’

He’d gathered all the boys in the corner of the pitch.

‘Come on.’Megan pulled my hand and led me to the edge of the pitch so we could get closer.Out of sight, but we could hear everything.

‘Some news, boys.Shane has left us.He’s gone back to Ferndale United.’

The boys started talking between themselves.

‘It’s going to be a bit of a blow to the team.I tried to convince him to stay, but he’s decided that Westing isn’t for him.It’s not for everyone.But now I know what kind of team we can be, I want to see extra effort from now on.’

Harrison’s words blurred into something inaudible.

‘Lex, are you OK?’Megan was staring at me with concern.

I shook my head because I didn’t know what else to do.He was supposed to be here.He was supposed to see how great I looked and want me back.

‘He left?’I said.

‘Yeah, he mustn’t have liked it here.’

‘Because of Niall and Hunter,’ I said, desperately trying to stop tears from coming.

I remembered how he’d said it would be easier if he left.

Easier for who?Not me.

And if someone had told me he wasn’t going to be there tonight, I’d have said I didn’t care, that he could keep his secrets and I never wanted to see him again.But it would have been a lie.

I didn’t expect the pain.The physical pain that seared through my chest and made me want to throw up.

26

I ignored all Mum’s requests to reduce my training.I did the opposite.I didn’t need Shane.Every morning that week I was outside, running laps and doing drills before school.I needed it, to get him out of my head.

Everything reminded me of Shane.The beach, catching a glimpse of my clarinet, even the cutlery in the kitchen brought me right back to that perfect night.But thoughts like that made me run harder.